How to ask for donations for funeral expenses: Templates

Mourners in a group hug
| 8 min read Financial assistance

When dealing with loss, the last thing you want to think about is how to pay for a funeral. The cost of burial services increases each year, and many families struggle to pay for a service to honour the life of their loved one. While many organisations help with funeral expenses and some government grants are available, finding assistance that covers the entire cost can be challenging.

During this difficult time, it’s important to remember that you can find help. This guide walks you through how to ask for donations for funeral expenses and offers some helpful funeral donation message examples to use. 

Fundraising for funeral expenses

Online fundraising through crowdfunding can be a helpful way to get assistance with funeral costs. A funeral fundraiser can provide a way for families to connect and heal together while paying tribute to a loved one.

Crowdfunding can provide assistance with funeral costs

Crowdfunding can be a great way to honour the memory of your loved one and give them the memorial service they deserve. For those wondering how to pay for a funeral with no money, crowdfunding can be the answer. 

Fundraising means more money for a funeral service

While starting a funeral fundraiser can help offset costly funeral expenses, some platforms charge a fee and take a certain percentage out of every donation you receive. On GoFundMe, there is no platform fee for organisers. Compare costs on our pricing page before you start fundraising.

Tips on how to ask for donations for funeral expenses

Knowing how to ask for donations can be difficult, especially when you’re dealing with grief or loss. Funeral donation requests are typically asked when informing others of a loss, within your loved one’s obituary, or during the funeral service itself. The following tips can help take the uncertainty out of asking for donations for funeral expenses on a personal donation website.

  • Tell your loved one’s story honestly: Creating a personal connection to your fundraiser will inspire more people to donate. Tell the story of your lost loved one authentically, and include why each donation is so important to you and your family.
  • Share what the funds will cover: Let your supporters know what specific costs are being raised for and where the money will be spent, whether it’s for funeral home fees, burial or cremation, flowers, a wake, or ongoing family expenses. Being specific helps people understand the impact of their donation and gives them confidence that their contribution will make a direct difference.
  • List specific funeral expenses: Break down the individual expenses of a funeral service so people will understand exactly how their donation will help. Listing a breakdown of expenses will also clear up any potential confusion about why you chose a specific fundraiser goal. 

How to request donations instead of flowers

Requesting donations in lieu of flowers is an established part of modern UK funeral etiquette. It gives mourners a meaningful way to pay their respects while directing support towards what is most needed, whether that is a GoFundMe fundraiser for funeral costs or a charity the person cared about. There’s no set amount expected. Give whatever feels right for your relationship with the person and your own circumstances.

How to word the request

Keep the wording brief and clear. You can add a request to a funeral notice, obituary, or social media post, for example:

  • “Family flowers only. If you wish to donate, please go to [GoFundMe fundraiser link].”
  • “In lieu of flowers, donations to [First Name]’s funeral fundraiser would be gratefully received.”
  • “To honour [First Name]’s memory, the family kindly requests donations in place of flowers.”
  • “Those wishing to give may contribute to the family’s GoFundMe fundraiser [link].” 

Where to share the request

Include the request in the funeral notice or online obituary, the service programme, and relevant social media posts. Make sure the fundraiser or donation link is clearly included so people can act without having to search for it.

Funeral donation amount etiquette in the UK

There is no fixed amount expected for a funeral donation in the UK, and the most important consideration is what you can comfortably afford. If you would normally send flowers, donating a similar amount can be a useful starting point, typically around £20 to £50. You can give more or less depending on your relationship with the deceased, your circumstances, and the personal significance of the specific cause.

You don’t need to disclose how much you have given, and you will be able to keep the donation amount private when contributing through GoFundMe. The gesture matters more than how much you give.

For families setting up a fundraiser, not to suggest a specific donation amount, but rather let supporters give what feels right for them. Keeping the fundraiser updated and thanking donors can also help encourage further contributions.

Three funeral donation message examples to use

The funeral donation message examples below can help you navigate the process of asking for funeral donations, no matter who you’re asking. Knowing the right funeral fundraiser wording will help you feel confident when making a request.

1. How to ask for funeral donations from friends and family

Keep the tone conversational, while explaining why and how any donation will help. Including an itemised list of expenses for the funeral service will help donors understand exactly how their donations will be used.

Subject line: Funeral for [First and Last Name]

Dear [friend or family member],

I am writing to you today to let you know about the loss of [First Name]. [Brief detail about your loved one’s passing, whether expected or sudden].

[First Name]’s obituary can be found here (link). The funeral service will be held at [location], on [date and time].

We are absolutely devastated by [First Name]’s passing and are struggling to find the funds to cover the cost of the service. Based on [researching expenses or quotes you’ve received], here is a breakdown of all the costs involved in a funeral service for [First Name]:

[itemised list of expenses]

I’ve started a fundraiser to collect donations for [First Name]’s funeral service. Here is the link. [Insert fundraiser URL]

Please consider donating if you are able to do so. We are so very grateful for every donation during this difficult time.

With love,

[Your Name]

2. How to ask for funeral donations from strangers

Asking for donations from strangers can feel scary, but it doesn’t have to be. Tell the story of your loved one, and focus on how important a funeral service is for your family. Below is a sample template you can use to share your funeral fundraiser on social media. Make sure to include at least one high-quality photo.

Our beloved [First Name] recently passed on [Date]. [First Name] was a wonderful [sister/brother, mother/father, or friend] who touched the lives of those around them. They leave behind [family members].

[First Name] dedicated their life to… [tell your loved one’s story in one or two sentences. Highlight how they made an impact, and share their goals, interests, or accomplishments].

We are all devastated by [First Name]’s loss and were not prepared for the high cost of a funeral service. We want to give [First Name] the memorial they deserve, to honour their memory and say our last goodbyes.

I am currently asking for donations to help cover the cost of [First Name]’s funeral. Any donation, no matter the size, would mean so much to our family during this time.

Here is a link to the fundraiser for [First Name]. [Insert fundraiser URL]

Thank you so much for your kindness and support. 

[Your Name]

3. How to ask for funeral donations from community members

If your loved one was an active member of their community, whether through a church or volunteer organisation, use the following template to reach out.

Subject line: Passing of [name of the organisation and role] [First and Last Name]

Dear [Community member],

You may know [First Name] from their work with [describe participation in group or organisation in a sentence or two, include accomplishments and impact].

Unfortunately, [First Name] passed away recently on [date].

As their [relation to your loved one], I have started a funeral fundraiser to help cover the cost of their funeral expenses. Our family was not prepared for the high cost of a funeral, and during this difficult time, we are reaching out to the community for help.

The fundraiser can be found here: [Insert fundraiser URL]. Any support, whether a donation or simply sharing the fundraiser with others who knew [First Name], would mean a great deal to our family.

(Optional) [First Name] deeply valued the work they did with [group or organisation]. If we exceed our goal, any additional funds will be donated to [group or organisation].

It would mean a lot if you could share [First Name]’s funeral fundraiser with others who knew them.

Thank you so much for your consideration,

[Your Name]

Find relief from high funeral costs

If you need assistance with funeral costs, online fundraising can provide financial relief. Knowing how to ask for donations for funeral expenses can remove the uncertainty of starting a fundraiser and allow you to focus on the healing process. Starting a GoFundMe fundraiser can help you focus on honouring your loved one’s memory, which is what matters most.

Written by GoFundMe