Maddies OCD fight #stolenlife
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Firstly thank you for taking the time to read my campaign babble. I was unsure where to start as my story has blurred over time. Where it started is still unfathomable. Where it ends is yet to be seen.
My name is Jo. I am married to David & have a beautiful daughter Maddie. Maddie is now 15 but shown here when she was a cheeky care free 5 year old. I chose to use the campaign photograph as it shows my family at a time when smiles were far more readily seen. When life was happy. It shows life before...
Before my daughter became ill. Before everything we had worked for was lost. Before smiles became less frequent.
An old fashioned courtship via pen and paper to my military pen pal is where my story should start. We wrote for 3 months before finally meeting and became husband and wife in 2006. David served 15 years military service within The RAF Regiment before his career was cut short due to injury. After a medical discharge David found suited employment quickly despite being left reeling. At this time I worked with vulnerable & disengaged young people. I had been employed with the same training company for 13 years and though happy I yearned for a life away from 'the rat race'. In 2008 in search of a better quality of life we left our jobs, sold our home and emigrated to a small village in Southern Spain. We bought a small village house and began our new life. Our family was happy. We had made plans but life had different ones...
In 2009 I said goodbye to my Dad aged just 59 after a short battle with cancer. The European financial crisis hit. Maddie became worryingly ill displaying signs of mental distress & Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. We battled and battled to obtain the best treatment for her but in a country that was not 'home' this was impossible. She became so severely ill she stopped leaving the house and life became unmanageable. She started to sleep in reverse so I started to do the same in order to care for her. Her fears of contamination became so bad it started to affect her ability to live. OCD started to take over my family like an invisible destructive force.
In 2013 we threw away our dreams and every penny invested in it and came home. We lost £89k invested in our Spanish home but our daughters health was our priority. We left a home we owned and came back to a life of renting with nothing in the bank. Since returning home our battle with Maddies illness continues to this day. We spend a small fortune on 'luxuries' such as antibacterial gel ( her current application number each time is 32), antibacterial wipes, baby wipes and antibacterial spray. My daughter is only able to wear clothing once and her bed needs to be changed every day due to 'germs' so I'm sure you can imagine our domestic fuel bills.
Maddie was further diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome upon returning to the UK which Additionally complicates her OCD and her recovery. She will begin specialist treatment with a specialist OCD team based at The Maudsley Hospital in London in 2 weeks. We have our fingers crossed but realise that they do not have a magic wand.
We hear much about OCD in the media. It is used in a flippant manor to express someone's preference. Someone is described as being 'a bit OCD' when they vaccum a room or move a cushion. OCD in its severest form destroys lives.
Maddie has been unable to attend any secondary education. She has spent months unable to leave the house instead held prisoner within 4 walls. I can't explain the joy I felt seeing her step back outside after 5 months. Anxiety prevents her from developing independence. She struggles to maintain friendships as OCD demands a great deal from those around her too. She is unable to attend to any personal care instead suffers the indignity of reliance upon me at a time when she should be out exploring the world and developing a sense of self. She eats once a day due to the rituals involved in decontaminating herself following meals. If I went into detail about the effect OCD has had on her life I would run out of space.
My beautiful child once described her life as ' I am the prey the world is the hunter'. From the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she falls asleep (when she can sleep) she is on alert. Thankfully she no longer talks of taking her life. She has started to talk about a future. She is terrified of her forthcoming treatment ' failing' and of the prospect of life 'like this' for ever. She tells me ' she couldn't go on' like this.
I have to show her life can be good again. Give her hope and something to look forward to.
My family have experienced more stress in a short period than is fair and it is far from over. Life has nearly torn my family & marriage apart. My child is facing the biggest battle of her life.
My campaign is to enable us to take a break in a place filled with happier memories. To allow us time to breathe, remember how to smile & remember how to be a family again.
I never envisaged asking strangers to help me provide something I feel we should be able to provide ourselves but we simply can't. My husband works hard but due to Maddies care needs my career is shelved. We are saving for a deposit for a secure home & a holiday though greatly needed is far from our grasp. My family is far more important than my pride hence here I am.
Thank you you for taking the time to read my campaign babble.
Thank me you in advance for any help you feel able to provide.
My name is Jo. I am married to David & have a beautiful daughter Maddie. Maddie is now 15 but shown here when she was a cheeky care free 5 year old. I chose to use the campaign photograph as it shows my family at a time when smiles were far more readily seen. When life was happy. It shows life before...
Before my daughter became ill. Before everything we had worked for was lost. Before smiles became less frequent.
An old fashioned courtship via pen and paper to my military pen pal is where my story should start. We wrote for 3 months before finally meeting and became husband and wife in 2006. David served 15 years military service within The RAF Regiment before his career was cut short due to injury. After a medical discharge David found suited employment quickly despite being left reeling. At this time I worked with vulnerable & disengaged young people. I had been employed with the same training company for 13 years and though happy I yearned for a life away from 'the rat race'. In 2008 in search of a better quality of life we left our jobs, sold our home and emigrated to a small village in Southern Spain. We bought a small village house and began our new life. Our family was happy. We had made plans but life had different ones...
In 2009 I said goodbye to my Dad aged just 59 after a short battle with cancer. The European financial crisis hit. Maddie became worryingly ill displaying signs of mental distress & Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. We battled and battled to obtain the best treatment for her but in a country that was not 'home' this was impossible. She became so severely ill she stopped leaving the house and life became unmanageable. She started to sleep in reverse so I started to do the same in order to care for her. Her fears of contamination became so bad it started to affect her ability to live. OCD started to take over my family like an invisible destructive force.
In 2013 we threw away our dreams and every penny invested in it and came home. We lost £89k invested in our Spanish home but our daughters health was our priority. We left a home we owned and came back to a life of renting with nothing in the bank. Since returning home our battle with Maddies illness continues to this day. We spend a small fortune on 'luxuries' such as antibacterial gel ( her current application number each time is 32), antibacterial wipes, baby wipes and antibacterial spray. My daughter is only able to wear clothing once and her bed needs to be changed every day due to 'germs' so I'm sure you can imagine our domestic fuel bills.
Maddie was further diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome upon returning to the UK which Additionally complicates her OCD and her recovery. She will begin specialist treatment with a specialist OCD team based at The Maudsley Hospital in London in 2 weeks. We have our fingers crossed but realise that they do not have a magic wand.
We hear much about OCD in the media. It is used in a flippant manor to express someone's preference. Someone is described as being 'a bit OCD' when they vaccum a room or move a cushion. OCD in its severest form destroys lives.
Maddie has been unable to attend any secondary education. She has spent months unable to leave the house instead held prisoner within 4 walls. I can't explain the joy I felt seeing her step back outside after 5 months. Anxiety prevents her from developing independence. She struggles to maintain friendships as OCD demands a great deal from those around her too. She is unable to attend to any personal care instead suffers the indignity of reliance upon me at a time when she should be out exploring the world and developing a sense of self. She eats once a day due to the rituals involved in decontaminating herself following meals. If I went into detail about the effect OCD has had on her life I would run out of space.
My beautiful child once described her life as ' I am the prey the world is the hunter'. From the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she falls asleep (when she can sleep) she is on alert. Thankfully she no longer talks of taking her life. She has started to talk about a future. She is terrified of her forthcoming treatment ' failing' and of the prospect of life 'like this' for ever. She tells me ' she couldn't go on' like this.
I have to show her life can be good again. Give her hope and something to look forward to.
My family have experienced more stress in a short period than is fair and it is far from over. Life has nearly torn my family & marriage apart. My child is facing the biggest battle of her life.
My campaign is to enable us to take a break in a place filled with happier memories. To allow us time to breathe, remember how to smile & remember how to be a family again.
I never envisaged asking strangers to help me provide something I feel we should be able to provide ourselves but we simply can't. My husband works hard but due to Maddies care needs my career is shelved. We are saving for a deposit for a secure home & a holiday though greatly needed is far from our grasp. My family is far more important than my pride hence here I am.
Thank you you for taking the time to read my campaign babble.
Thank me you in advance for any help you feel able to provide.
Organizer
Jo Shovelton-Fullick
Organizer
