Disabled & at risk of homelessness
Donation protected
***There seems to have been some confusion regarding my link name vs my Facebook name. During the course of all of this I've realized that I identify as genderqueer and my legal first name no longer fits my gender identify so I go by my middle name, Lee. Sorry for any confusion.***
In 2006, I was diagnosed with PTSD. For the past three years or so I've had tremendous amounts of trouble finding any lasting reprieve from my mental health struggles. Since 2012, I have tried many treatment methods including 3 months in a partial hospitalization program, over two years of one on one therapy, countless medications, getting a service dog (who I'm pictured with in my photo) and another partial hospitilization recently, all with limited success. During that time, I was out of work on short term and was terminated when I went on long term disability. Around late fall 2014, evidence began pointing to PTSD not being the only diagnosis and me actually having some form of mood disorder as
well. Since then, three different psychiatrists and a therapist have all pointed toward a potential diagnosis of Bipolar II Disorder. However because none of them felt they'd seen me long enough to confirm the diagnosis, my long term disability insurer denied my claim and I lost my benefits through them, which was my only source of income. I am frustrated that I haven't been getting sufficient care and have recently switched my primary care to Fenway Health because I've heard very good things about their Behavioral Health providers. By moving my pcp there, I will be able to see a therapist and psychiatrist there but they currently have an 8-10 week wait for those services. I hope that once I start seeing them we can get me properly diagnosed so we can start treating in a more effective way.
Further complicating matters, I was in a car accident on 2/4/2014 and have experienced chronic pain for the past year as a result of that. I have undergone numerous x-rays, CT scans, and MRIs and we still can't seem to resolve my pain. In terms of treatment, I have tried two rounds of physical therapy, chiropractic treatment, myofascial release, trigger point injections, massage therapy, TENS units, cervical traction, ice, heat, and boatloads of medications and nothing even begins to cut through the pain and some modalities have actually made the pain worse. I will be seeing a pain psychologist to help me better cope with the pain but his earliest appointment isn't until late April. My pain doctor also just referred me to aquatherapy and we are considering the possibility of facet joint injections in my neck, as other ways to potentially relieve my pain. I wish I could say I was optimistic about finding relief but it's been a really trying process and I just feel like I'm going to be in pain forever at this rate. Hopefully I'm wrong and my providers will be able to get this all sorted out soon.
The combinination of chronic pain and a confusing mental health condition have made it incredibly difficult to get any decent sleep for a very long time and I am just so far beyond mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted that all I can do some days is cry and cuddle Tesla. Because of the combination of pain, fatigue, and unpredictable moods, I'm finding it hard to do basic tasks like cook, clean, care for myself, do errands, etc. I am very thankful to have a friend who helps with cleaning on a somewhat regular but I do also struggle with hoarding-type behavior and disorganization that is a huge source of stress for me. I have asked numerous providers (doctors, therapists, office on disability, independent living center, vocational rehab, etc) for referrals to services for this but have come up empty every time. I try to chip away at it on my own but have not been very successful so far.
Because these problems have had such a detrimental effect on my functioning, I already applied for SSI and SSDI in July 2013. However, those processes can take upwards of 18 months depending on the current case load and I've yet to be given a hearing date.
I'm hoping to raise enough money to get by until I can get proper mental and physical health treatment and be able to return to work, I get an official Bipolar II diagnosis and can appeal my insurance denial to have my benefits reinstated, or until my SSI/SSDI case hearing takes place and I am able to get benefits. I have no idea how long any of those three outcomes may take and the additional stress of having uncertainty about even having a place to live or food to eat (for both myself and furkids) is certainly not helping my mental health which in turn is not helping my physical health.
It's incredibly humbling for me to even admit that I'm having such a hard time with normal daily life and am having financial hardship. Many know me as a strong, stubborn, and resilient woman but this time I just can't shake it on my own and I need help getting through this. I'm sure most of you may be surprised to learn that any of this was even going on or the extent to which these health problems have ravaged my life. I suppose that's because I've learned so well to hide it for fear of stigmas around mental health or simply not wanting to appear weak and vulnerable. But it's time to be honest and ask for help to get myself back on my feet instead of trying to be "strong" and just making things harder than they need to be.
Any amount is helpful and extremely appreciated. I know that times are tough and we're all struggling so if you aren't in a position to donate, please share my page. Any advice for connecting to resources for any of the things I'm struggling with could also be really helpful.
Thanks so much for reading! If you have any questions, please ask.
Lee
In 2006, I was diagnosed with PTSD. For the past three years or so I've had tremendous amounts of trouble finding any lasting reprieve from my mental health struggles. Since 2012, I have tried many treatment methods including 3 months in a partial hospitalization program, over two years of one on one therapy, countless medications, getting a service dog (who I'm pictured with in my photo) and another partial hospitilization recently, all with limited success. During that time, I was out of work on short term and was terminated when I went on long term disability. Around late fall 2014, evidence began pointing to PTSD not being the only diagnosis and me actually having some form of mood disorder as
well. Since then, three different psychiatrists and a therapist have all pointed toward a potential diagnosis of Bipolar II Disorder. However because none of them felt they'd seen me long enough to confirm the diagnosis, my long term disability insurer denied my claim and I lost my benefits through them, which was my only source of income. I am frustrated that I haven't been getting sufficient care and have recently switched my primary care to Fenway Health because I've heard very good things about their Behavioral Health providers. By moving my pcp there, I will be able to see a therapist and psychiatrist there but they currently have an 8-10 week wait for those services. I hope that once I start seeing them we can get me properly diagnosed so we can start treating in a more effective way.
Further complicating matters, I was in a car accident on 2/4/2014 and have experienced chronic pain for the past year as a result of that. I have undergone numerous x-rays, CT scans, and MRIs and we still can't seem to resolve my pain. In terms of treatment, I have tried two rounds of physical therapy, chiropractic treatment, myofascial release, trigger point injections, massage therapy, TENS units, cervical traction, ice, heat, and boatloads of medications and nothing even begins to cut through the pain and some modalities have actually made the pain worse. I will be seeing a pain psychologist to help me better cope with the pain but his earliest appointment isn't until late April. My pain doctor also just referred me to aquatherapy and we are considering the possibility of facet joint injections in my neck, as other ways to potentially relieve my pain. I wish I could say I was optimistic about finding relief but it's been a really trying process and I just feel like I'm going to be in pain forever at this rate. Hopefully I'm wrong and my providers will be able to get this all sorted out soon.
The combinination of chronic pain and a confusing mental health condition have made it incredibly difficult to get any decent sleep for a very long time and I am just so far beyond mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted that all I can do some days is cry and cuddle Tesla. Because of the combination of pain, fatigue, and unpredictable moods, I'm finding it hard to do basic tasks like cook, clean, care for myself, do errands, etc. I am very thankful to have a friend who helps with cleaning on a somewhat regular but I do also struggle with hoarding-type behavior and disorganization that is a huge source of stress for me. I have asked numerous providers (doctors, therapists, office on disability, independent living center, vocational rehab, etc) for referrals to services for this but have come up empty every time. I try to chip away at it on my own but have not been very successful so far.
Because these problems have had such a detrimental effect on my functioning, I already applied for SSI and SSDI in July 2013. However, those processes can take upwards of 18 months depending on the current case load and I've yet to be given a hearing date.
I'm hoping to raise enough money to get by until I can get proper mental and physical health treatment and be able to return to work, I get an official Bipolar II diagnosis and can appeal my insurance denial to have my benefits reinstated, or until my SSI/SSDI case hearing takes place and I am able to get benefits. I have no idea how long any of those three outcomes may take and the additional stress of having uncertainty about even having a place to live or food to eat (for both myself and furkids) is certainly not helping my mental health which in turn is not helping my physical health.
It's incredibly humbling for me to even admit that I'm having such a hard time with normal daily life and am having financial hardship. Many know me as a strong, stubborn, and resilient woman but this time I just can't shake it on my own and I need help getting through this. I'm sure most of you may be surprised to learn that any of this was even going on or the extent to which these health problems have ravaged my life. I suppose that's because I've learned so well to hide it for fear of stigmas around mental health or simply not wanting to appear weak and vulnerable. But it's time to be honest and ask for help to get myself back on my feet instead of trying to be "strong" and just making things harder than they need to be.
Any amount is helpful and extremely appreciated. I know that times are tough and we're all struggling so if you aren't in a position to donate, please share my page. Any advice for connecting to resources for any of the things I'm struggling with could also be really helpful.
Thanks so much for reading! If you have any questions, please ask.
Lee
Organizer
Lee Hunter
Organizer
Somerville, MA
