Save Lord Fozzworth!
Donation protected
***DISCLAIMER***
This description is very serious, despite it's farcical nature. It is my attempt to make light, and remain brave during a very tough time. Please continue to the bottom if you prefer the humorless, heartbreaking version.
Fozzy needs your help!
His name is Lord Fozzworth Fuzzington III. He has been called many names; Fluffmaster Flex, Sir Fuzzbutt, Fruffinbottom of Fuzzwater, Fuzzalonius Rex, Fluffopatomous, Lord Fluffington, Fat-man-cat-dude, and Dr. Fruffenstein are rather notable, but he is most commonly known as Fozzy. To outside observers he appears as a normal, pure bred Maincoon cat. As we all know, cats are indifferent, capricious animals who overtly ponder your doom. This creature, however, is well-manared, considerate, and a staunch defender of justice. With his gentlemans' charm and suspiciously adorable nature, one can only assume that he is an alien who was sent here from his home planet to learn our ways, gain our trust, and conquer us from within......assumingly with intolerable levels of cuteness, more fluff than we could possibly endure, and purring us into submission. We are not afraid, and will face this terrifying threat head-on! Through dedicated teams of professionals we have discovered a large mass in his belly, which appears to be a cybernetic implant cleverly disguised as a life-threatening tumor. If our theory is correct, by removing it we could buy ourselves another 10-15 years to prepare for the battle ahead. Due to massive research expendatures, our budgetary limits to remove this dangerout piece of alien matter and neutralize this threat have been exhausted. We need YOUR help, Citizen! With your pledge, no matter how small, you are contributing to the fight against this terror which haunts us! Removal of this mass is very risky, and is not guaranteed to suceed, but there is no greater evil than apathy. We have to try to eliminate this threat and learn about it's nature before it's too late! With this proceedure we may further study him and learn about this creature before the inevitable invasion of deceptively cute, and well-mannered monsters sure to doom us all! Your investment today, is an investment in the future! Thank you for your time, and consideration.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
*****WARNING*****
Sadness ahead
My fluffy, wonderful, majestic, boy Fozzy is dying. I have raised him from a kitten so young that he could lay comfortably on the palm of my hand. Today he is nearly 14 pounds, and is still the most wonderful Fuzzy Bear ever. He waits by the door for my return, or sleeps on my clothing while away. He plays fetch, and follows me around like a puppy. He responds when you talk to him and his face is more expressive than the words of many people I have known. He has been inseparable from me ever since he came into my world like a tumblefuzz on the wind, and has been there with me through some of the toughest trials of my life. The hardships we have endured would break a lesser creature; yet he has gone through so much with me, and shouldered it all as a champion bearing the weight of his crown. Graceful and dignified, he seems destined to fulfill his role as the greatest fluffernaut that ever lived; a true champion to us all. He means the absolute world to me, and last week the vet told me that he has a large, likely-cancerous tumor embedded in the tissue around his intestine, and that there is little chance of doing anything beyond making him loved and comfortable until he is suffering. They stated that the test results would likely indicate that we would have to remove a giant, unsurvivable portion of his intestines, and that would buy him months at best. They told me that my boy was dying.
The test results of the cytology came back today and were surprising in that they seemed to indicate that this mass may in-fact be able to be removed successfully. I have a further consultation scheduled to ask more questions and will update this page as information comes available, but initial talks tell me that this could save my best friend. This will cost $2-3,000 and they have given tentative odds of successfully removing the entire mass and recovering to be at 70%. They could also cut him open and find out that yes, there is in fact nothing they can do and he is going to die in some undetermined months anyway; now recovering from major surgery. He is strong. He is a majestic, stalwart champion to his people, and a great warrior. I believe that with our help, he can win this battle. He has given so much to me, and if the doctors say that I have a chance of rolling the dice to save his life, I feel I owe it to The Amazing Fozzworth to roll the best damn dice I can. I have to try.
As someone who was laid off relatively recently and just graduated college, my funds are rather thin. I humbly request your assistance, my friends. Some of you know him personally, and know the joy he brings to this world. Some of you may be strangers, but know of his glory. Some of you may never have known the tale of The Fuzzworth Chronicles, but my hope is that this plea resonates through you and brings the hope to you that he has brought to me these last 7+ years. I may not be able to repay you today, or tomorrow, or have fancy rewards to offer....but every pledge for my boy will gain my neverending appreciation and love. You will have bought me something priceless, and given the most precious creature in the world to me a chance at life. That is a debt that is beyond value, and one I will surely never forget. Thank you for all your help.
This description is very serious, despite it's farcical nature. It is my attempt to make light, and remain brave during a very tough time. Please continue to the bottom if you prefer the humorless, heartbreaking version.
Fozzy needs your help!
His name is Lord Fozzworth Fuzzington III. He has been called many names; Fluffmaster Flex, Sir Fuzzbutt, Fruffinbottom of Fuzzwater, Fuzzalonius Rex, Fluffopatomous, Lord Fluffington, Fat-man-cat-dude, and Dr. Fruffenstein are rather notable, but he is most commonly known as Fozzy. To outside observers he appears as a normal, pure bred Maincoon cat. As we all know, cats are indifferent, capricious animals who overtly ponder your doom. This creature, however, is well-manared, considerate, and a staunch defender of justice. With his gentlemans' charm and suspiciously adorable nature, one can only assume that he is an alien who was sent here from his home planet to learn our ways, gain our trust, and conquer us from within......assumingly with intolerable levels of cuteness, more fluff than we could possibly endure, and purring us into submission. We are not afraid, and will face this terrifying threat head-on! Through dedicated teams of professionals we have discovered a large mass in his belly, which appears to be a cybernetic implant cleverly disguised as a life-threatening tumor. If our theory is correct, by removing it we could buy ourselves another 10-15 years to prepare for the battle ahead. Due to massive research expendatures, our budgetary limits to remove this dangerout piece of alien matter and neutralize this threat have been exhausted. We need YOUR help, Citizen! With your pledge, no matter how small, you are contributing to the fight against this terror which haunts us! Removal of this mass is very risky, and is not guaranteed to suceed, but there is no greater evil than apathy. We have to try to eliminate this threat and learn about it's nature before it's too late! With this proceedure we may further study him and learn about this creature before the inevitable invasion of deceptively cute, and well-mannered monsters sure to doom us all! Your investment today, is an investment in the future! Thank you for your time, and consideration.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
*****WARNING*****
Sadness ahead
My fluffy, wonderful, majestic, boy Fozzy is dying. I have raised him from a kitten so young that he could lay comfortably on the palm of my hand. Today he is nearly 14 pounds, and is still the most wonderful Fuzzy Bear ever. He waits by the door for my return, or sleeps on my clothing while away. He plays fetch, and follows me around like a puppy. He responds when you talk to him and his face is more expressive than the words of many people I have known. He has been inseparable from me ever since he came into my world like a tumblefuzz on the wind, and has been there with me through some of the toughest trials of my life. The hardships we have endured would break a lesser creature; yet he has gone through so much with me, and shouldered it all as a champion bearing the weight of his crown. Graceful and dignified, he seems destined to fulfill his role as the greatest fluffernaut that ever lived; a true champion to us all. He means the absolute world to me, and last week the vet told me that he has a large, likely-cancerous tumor embedded in the tissue around his intestine, and that there is little chance of doing anything beyond making him loved and comfortable until he is suffering. They stated that the test results would likely indicate that we would have to remove a giant, unsurvivable portion of his intestines, and that would buy him months at best. They told me that my boy was dying.
The test results of the cytology came back today and were surprising in that they seemed to indicate that this mass may in-fact be able to be removed successfully. I have a further consultation scheduled to ask more questions and will update this page as information comes available, but initial talks tell me that this could save my best friend. This will cost $2-3,000 and they have given tentative odds of successfully removing the entire mass and recovering to be at 70%. They could also cut him open and find out that yes, there is in fact nothing they can do and he is going to die in some undetermined months anyway; now recovering from major surgery. He is strong. He is a majestic, stalwart champion to his people, and a great warrior. I believe that with our help, he can win this battle. He has given so much to me, and if the doctors say that I have a chance of rolling the dice to save his life, I feel I owe it to The Amazing Fozzworth to roll the best damn dice I can. I have to try.
As someone who was laid off relatively recently and just graduated college, my funds are rather thin. I humbly request your assistance, my friends. Some of you know him personally, and know the joy he brings to this world. Some of you may be strangers, but know of his glory. Some of you may never have known the tale of The Fuzzworth Chronicles, but my hope is that this plea resonates through you and brings the hope to you that he has brought to me these last 7+ years. I may not be able to repay you today, or tomorrow, or have fancy rewards to offer....but every pledge for my boy will gain my neverending appreciation and love. You will have bought me something priceless, and given the most precious creature in the world to me a chance at life. That is a debt that is beyond value, and one I will surely never forget. Thank you for all your help.
Organizer
Guido Mancipioni
Organizer
St. Petersburg, FL
