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Going home to treat mental illness

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English
Hello. My name is Diana Livesay and my, or better, our story started in 2005 when me and my, now, husband Sam, met. I was living in Romania he was in the USA in 2010 when we started a relationship. Long story short, we got married and I moved with him in USA so we could start a family togheter.





Unfortunatatelly things didn't go as we hoped. We planned to live with his family for a while until we found a place. My husband had a good paying job at a local factory. 3 days after we got married some members of his family started abusing me and we left. We lived in a motel until they asked us to move back, so we gave them a second chance. 

Not long after that, the abuse started again. I was being threatened, hit, shaken, called names when my husband was at work and sometimes in front of him. I started not being able to get out of my room and sleep, had to see a psychiatrist because my behaviour was shifting rapidly, until i ended up running away. I went to my husband's work place from where he took me and we went to live in the motel again for almost a year. During this time I did not leave my motel room for long because I was afraid of people. We adopted a shelter dog named Gizmo so I wouldn't have to stay alone all the time, since my husband was working long shifts.



At one point my family in Romania helped us with some money so we could pay a desposit for a rent in another town. We moved in a small house. I was suffering from post traumatic stress disorder so I started doing nail art and opened a blog so I can have my mood swings in control. I had been abused while dealing with a severe cultural shock and in reponse my mind turned completely uncontrollable.

My blog link: http://deenailsblog.blogspot.com/
Over time my disorder got worse and it's cotinuing to get worse. After i run away from my in laws, my husband lost his job because one of his family members. He's now working at a local fast food making no more than 600$ a month. We're behind on rent, food is very little, we lived months without water. Our landlord has been the only one to ever lend a hand. My husband is struggling to keep us surviving and also dealing with my disorder that keeps getting worse and it's affecting him as well. We live with no health insurance, no car, no public transport, in the middle of nowhere.

Since his family did nothing to help ous out, my family in Romania has been trying to help us with money but the big difference between USD and romanian RON is so great, it's becoming impossible for them. We've decided to go back, where both of us could get jobs, a place to live and psychiatric care for me, since Im at the point where I cannot face people anymore without getting panic attacks after, or I'm having episodes of memory loss after panic attacks.

Those who don't want to donate through go fund me can do it through paypal at [email redacted]. We will add them as offline donations here to keep the bar going.

The few friends I have asked me to open a funding account here before, but I was to embarassed to do it. But it's getting to the point where both of us are losing hope and my depression is too hard to cope with. We can't afford life itself anymore. We're raising this ammount for:

-plane tickets for both of us 
-passport, required vaccines and transport for our dog Gizmo
-passport for me because my romanian passport expired

-mailing of the few things we own
-surviving 1-2 months until one of us has a job

I have an active health insurance back in Romania and a family both of us can lean on in times of need. It won't be easy if we leave either, but it would be easier and I could have my worsening PTSD handled and hopefully fixed.

With this occasion I want to thank everyone that helped us with money for food, dog food, bills and long distance moral support. You will not be forgotten when I get my life and my mind back togheter

Romana

Buna ziua. Numele meu este Diana Livesay. Povestea noastra a inceput in 2005, cand eu si sotul meu ne-am cunoscut. In 2011 m-am mutat in statele unite pentru a fi alaturi de el si ne-am casatorit in acelasi an.

La inceput am locuit cu familia lui, planunind sa ne gasim o casa. Sotul meu avea un loc de munca bine platit la o fabrica din zona. Din pacate lucrurile nu au stat cum ne-am asteptat. In timp ce sotul meu era la munca eu eram batuta, injurata si facuta in toate felurile de catre unul dintre membrii familiei sale. Ne-am mutat la un motel din apropierea locului de munca al sotului meu, pana cand familia lui ne-a rugat sa ne mutam inapoi si noi le-am dat o a doua sansa.

Din nefericire abuzul a continuat pana am fugit de acasa. Cand m-am mutat aici, am avut un soc cultural din cauza diferentei dintre Romania si America si fiind abuzata fizic si psihic timp de mai multe luni de zile, am ajuns sa sufar de stres post traumatic. In cazul meu, acesta se manifesta prin atacuri de panica frecvente, depresie severa, agresivitate, pierdere temporara de memorie in urma furiei excesive. In acelasi timp m-am indepartat de societate cat de mult am putut. Timp de 2 ani de zile am stat in casa, intre 4 pereti, pentru ca imi era si inca imi este frica de oameni.

Acum locuim intr-o casa inchiriata, impreuna cu catelul nostru pe care l-am adoptat de la un adapost pentru a-mi tine companie cand sunt singura. Am stat toata vara fara apa, pentru ca nu ne puteam plati toate facturile. Am trait cu apa de ploaie mai bine de 4 luni. Acum nu avem apa calda de mai bine de 2 luni. Desi sotul meu face doar 600$ pe luna, bani care nu acopera nici pe departe cheltuielile lunare, care sunt ridicole fata de Romania, nu cerem ajutor pentru viata noastra de zi cu zi.
Noi nu avem asigurare medicala si traim intr-un orasel de cam 1000 de persoane, intre munti, izolati. Tot ce vrem este sa ne introarcem in Cluj, Romania, unde eu am familie, card de sanatate si posibilitatea de a fi tratata pentru boala psihica de care sufar si unde putem sa ne refacem viata muncind.
Banii adunati vor merge strict catre:
-reinoirea pasaportului meu care a expirat
-2 bilete de avion
-bilet, vaccinuri obligatorii si cusca de transport pentru catelul nostru Gizmo de care eu nu pot sa ma despart
-trimiterea prin posta a putinelor lucruri pe care le avem
-supravietuirea noastra timp de 2-3 luni pana cand amandoi avem un loc de munca asigurat

Nu vrem sa cerem de pomana sa stam fara sa facem nimic.  Eu am scoala, am o calificare ca si invatator-educatoare. Vrem sa muncim si sa ne asiguram un trai decent singuri. Dar avem nevoie de un inceput, pe care nu ni-l permitem singuri. Boala mea se agraveaza pe zi ce trece si nu stiu cat mai pot sa-mi tin capul drept si sa merg inainte.

Va multumesc

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Organizer

DeeDee Livesay
Organizer
Gate City, VA

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