Praying for a miracle
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My names Lexi and I set this up for my "mother in law" who is my mom to me and our family. She wrote the message below. Please take a moment to ready our story and say a prayer for us. God bless!
I have been laying here trying to figure out how to get my family a Christmas to remember as this is my last Christmas with them. I have had 38 operations in my abdomen alone since 2010 to include removal of my stomach and all but 12' of my small intestines. I have over 5 million in medical bills and they keep piling up and the last thing I want to do is leave my family with all that debt. We have no money for Christmas but worse yet we have no money for rent, lights, water, or food. My husband was laid off because he couldn't be over the road due to my terminal illness. I have leukemia, no stomach, barely any small intestines, and I have a severe back that makes it almost impossible to even walk around. I am slowly starving to death in front of my kids and I know that there is not enough left of me to make it through another Christmas. I have to watch my babies see me dieing in front of there eyes. I have went from this "Nothing can stop me,working all the time to laying in bed barely able to stay awake for 3 hours a day. My kidneys are now in failure as well as the infection is back in my abdomen and I am so afraid that I'm going to die with my family homeless and nothing even to eat. I pray so much and it seems that nothing helps. I have to come up with a deposit of $1100 and rent of $1025 in the next 11 days plus pack up and move and lets not forget my babies are waiting for Santa to come. To hear them say "We don't need a tree and presents momma cause we have you rips my heart out. I can't imagine not being able to hold them and take there pain away. Being the cause of it and not being able to say how sorry I am for causing it. This family is my world and I'm leaving them in so much debt, without a home or even food on the table. What a way to leave this world when you have always been the one to take care of there needs and wants. I feel so helpless and I'm the cause of it all! How I wish I could take it all back, fix my illness's and be here for them. What do I do when I can't even make the money they need or even have the money for dinner tonight. I look at there faces and just cry cause that is all I can do for them. Tell them just what they mean to me and that I wish I could fix this. It is funny how you help so many people your whole life and not even the state will help you. I have tried to get loans but with my credit as it is due to all the medical debt I can't even get that for them. I can't imagine waking up on Christmas with no where to go and nothing for them to give them my last good bye. The disappointment and fear i'll see in there eyes even though they say its OK. Mom has always pulled something out of the hat but she is got nothing left, just some skin over her bones and some tired eyes to look at them. I wish there really were miracles here on earth. Something to leave my babies and a home to keep them warm. 1 of my nurses seen one of my posts and said how sorry she was to see such a vibrant women be so sick and in the position that I'm in now. I simply said How much I appreciated all the help she gave me in the hospital all those months. How I pray something would happen. Babies Mom is so sorry I let you down when you needed me the most. Please know I love you all so very much and it was the best day of my life each time I gave birth to each of you. You made me who I am. Please know I'll forever love You all.
I have been laying here trying to figure out how to get my family a Christmas to remember as this is my last Christmas with them. I have had 38 operations in my abdomen alone since 2010 to include removal of my stomach and all but 12' of my small intestines. I have over 5 million in medical bills and they keep piling up and the last thing I want to do is leave my family with all that debt. We have no money for Christmas but worse yet we have no money for rent, lights, water, or food. My husband was laid off because he couldn't be over the road due to my terminal illness. I have leukemia, no stomach, barely any small intestines, and I have a severe back that makes it almost impossible to even walk around. I am slowly starving to death in front of my kids and I know that there is not enough left of me to make it through another Christmas. I have to watch my babies see me dieing in front of there eyes. I have went from this "Nothing can stop me,working all the time to laying in bed barely able to stay awake for 3 hours a day. My kidneys are now in failure as well as the infection is back in my abdomen and I am so afraid that I'm going to die with my family homeless and nothing even to eat. I pray so much and it seems that nothing helps. I have to come up with a deposit of $1100 and rent of $1025 in the next 11 days plus pack up and move and lets not forget my babies are waiting for Santa to come. To hear them say "We don't need a tree and presents momma cause we have you rips my heart out. I can't imagine not being able to hold them and take there pain away. Being the cause of it and not being able to say how sorry I am for causing it. This family is my world and I'm leaving them in so much debt, without a home or even food on the table. What a way to leave this world when you have always been the one to take care of there needs and wants. I feel so helpless and I'm the cause of it all! How I wish I could take it all back, fix my illness's and be here for them. What do I do when I can't even make the money they need or even have the money for dinner tonight. I look at there faces and just cry cause that is all I can do for them. Tell them just what they mean to me and that I wish I could fix this. It is funny how you help so many people your whole life and not even the state will help you. I have tried to get loans but with my credit as it is due to all the medical debt I can't even get that for them. I can't imagine waking up on Christmas with no where to go and nothing for them to give them my last good bye. The disappointment and fear i'll see in there eyes even though they say its OK. Mom has always pulled something out of the hat but she is got nothing left, just some skin over her bones and some tired eyes to look at them. I wish there really were miracles here on earth. Something to leave my babies and a home to keep them warm. 1 of my nurses seen one of my posts and said how sorry she was to see such a vibrant women be so sick and in the position that I'm in now. I simply said How much I appreciated all the help she gave me in the hospital all those months. How I pray something would happen. Babies Mom is so sorry I let you down when you needed me the most. Please know I love you all so very much and it was the best day of my life each time I gave birth to each of you. You made me who I am. Please know I'll forever love You all.
Organizer
Lexi Kapri
Organizer
Kennewick, WA