Sue's Facial Feminisation Surgery Fundraiser

In so far as I’m known on social media, I’m known as Sue Gives A F**k, but in human form I’m Nell and I’m a trans woman. Unless I’m in my day job or at a medical appointment or joining a new group or meeting someone for the first time or signing off an email, at which times I deadname myself by default. Because when I look in the mirror, I don’t see a woman, and neither does anyone who meets me. I don’t think of being called ‘sir’ as being misgendered because I’ve got nothing to compare it to. Literally no one has ever met me and thought I’m anything other than a man. And I absolutely cannot blame them. It makes me a bit embarrassed to claim for myself the name ‘woman’. When asked my gender or pronouns I usually say ‘I use them all’. I do use them all, but I’d love not to.

There’s a real limit to what hormones and makeup and clothes can do so my dream for a long time has been to have facial feminisation surgery to change the more masculine features of my face. I’ve been saving up for 5 years and alongside performing I’ve always worked full time. Even so, at current rates, it’ll take between 6 and 15 more years to build up the money, depending on how deluxe an option I go for. I’d love not to wait that long.

The cheapest option, as with all surgery, is Turkey. There’s a hospital in Istanbul where I can get a browbone shave, forehead reduction, lip lift, and fat transfer for £12,000, which is wildly cheap. For £15,000 I can get it done in Thailand and they’ll throw in a nose job, at a well-regarded hospital, although you’ve got to add on flights and the process is a bit opaque and one-size-fits-all. For £17,000 I can get it done in London, but it’ll just be the brow bone shave, forehead reduction, and lip lift. The top of the line ultra deluxe option is, surprisingly, in Marbella. It’s a clinic called FacialTeam, who created the images above. They get the best results and deliver the most bespoke service but, inevitably, that costs £30,000.

The most likely and probably best option for me is, rather than do everything at once, to get one or two things done as I get the money. So honestly any amount of money I can raise would be a huge help towards changing my life. I’m incredibly ashamed to be asking. There are more important things for you to spend your money on. But I’m finding it hard to concentrate on anything else, so if you have anything to spare, I’d be forever grateful.