A Daughter's Promise
Donation protected
Sitting in the ICU conference room, watching the doctors lips move without emotion, I heard her words in pieces...
heart attack
massive strokes
feeding tubes
paralysis
brain dead
ventilator
depression
all these words swelling my head ended with one devastating question, that I would have never fathomed being asked, especially at 27 years old. "Do you want me to treat your father, or do you want me to take him off life support?"
I sat there for a moment with thoughts rushing through my mind. 'I have an option? This is really a choice? Is this woman asking me to play God?'
After some time listening to my mom deliriously ramble off questions and watching my younger brother nervously fidget in his seat, together we came up with the decision, treat him.
Many emotions swirled around me, I was angry. This wasn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to retire in 3 months, he was supposed to travel and walk me down the aisle some day. I was sad, yet I was also relieved. He was still alive, I can still see him and talk to him.
I then asked myself, why? Why treat him and put my father through a life of pain, suffering, infections, disabilities, and more risks. Am I being selfish? Am I doing this for me or for him?
The answer I came up with the day I sat in that conference room was, no, I am not being selfish. I am not just opting for life, I am opting for a beautiful life filled with joy.
How will my dad have a quality of life filled with happiness?
I will bring it to him.
I promised myself that day, to devote myself everyday to bring my father joy and to always make him proud.
Today, one year later, my dad regained his ability to swallow and breath on his own. He did not lose any of his memory or senses and he is able to talk. Unfortunately he lost the use of his left side and is unable to walk or care for himself.
To make my promise possible, I am reaching out to you for help. We are raising money to install a vertical wheelchair lift and handicap bathroom. My dad is currently living in the one room basement of his home, unable to get to the main living area via stairs, chair lifts or ramps. With these home improvements, my dad will be able to get around the house more independently with his power wheelchair, take a hot shower and most importantly, join his family around the kitchen table for a holiday dinner.
I made this promise on January 13th, 2014, with your help, we can make this happen and bring my father happiness, just as he always brought me.
thank you for your support
heart attack
massive strokes
feeding tubes
paralysis
brain dead
ventilator
depression
all these words swelling my head ended with one devastating question, that I would have never fathomed being asked, especially at 27 years old. "Do you want me to treat your father, or do you want me to take him off life support?"
I sat there for a moment with thoughts rushing through my mind. 'I have an option? This is really a choice? Is this woman asking me to play God?'
After some time listening to my mom deliriously ramble off questions and watching my younger brother nervously fidget in his seat, together we came up with the decision, treat him.
Many emotions swirled around me, I was angry. This wasn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to retire in 3 months, he was supposed to travel and walk me down the aisle some day. I was sad, yet I was also relieved. He was still alive, I can still see him and talk to him.
I then asked myself, why? Why treat him and put my father through a life of pain, suffering, infections, disabilities, and more risks. Am I being selfish? Am I doing this for me or for him?
The answer I came up with the day I sat in that conference room was, no, I am not being selfish. I am not just opting for life, I am opting for a beautiful life filled with joy.
How will my dad have a quality of life filled with happiness?
I will bring it to him.
I promised myself that day, to devote myself everyday to bring my father joy and to always make him proud.
Today, one year later, my dad regained his ability to swallow and breath on his own. He did not lose any of his memory or senses and he is able to talk. Unfortunately he lost the use of his left side and is unable to walk or care for himself.
To make my promise possible, I am reaching out to you for help. We are raising money to install a vertical wheelchair lift and handicap bathroom. My dad is currently living in the one room basement of his home, unable to get to the main living area via stairs, chair lifts or ramps. With these home improvements, my dad will be able to get around the house more independently with his power wheelchair, take a hot shower and most importantly, join his family around the kitchen table for a holiday dinner.
I made this promise on January 13th, 2014, with your help, we can make this happen and bring my father happiness, just as he always brought me.
thank you for your support
Organizer
Stephanie Totilo
Organizer
Danvers, MA
