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Cancer Survivor-Musical Dreams

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My name is Matthew. I am a 25 year old cancer survivor from Los Angeles, California.

At the beginning of 2013, I was 23 years old and found a lump on my left testicle and immediately had it checked out. After hours of waiting in the emergency room, various testing and scans- I was diagnosed with testicular cancer.

From that moment on, my life was completely altered and tossed upside down and inside out. After my initial diagnosis I was forced to leave my job in pursuit of immediate treatment for my cancer and as I had no insurance, all of my treatment had to go through county facilities. My first experience with treatment included an invasive surgical procedure which saw the removal of my left testicle. I hoped that this would be the end of my experience with cancer but unfortunately, CT scans later revealed that the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes and that it occupied most of the back left side of my stomach area.

What followed was another invasive surgical procedure called an RPLND otherwise known as a lymph node dissection. During this procedure, my stomach was cut open from the bottom of my chest to just above my hip line, surpassing my navel. During this procedure, chunks of my lymph nodes were removed in efforts to combat the cancer growing inside of me.

After the RPLND, I was forced in to chemotherapy. I lost my hair, sex drive, strength, independence and on the worst days, my will to live. That experience was without a doubt, the worst time in my life to date. The only thing that got me through it was an unabashed love of music. It was in the sweet notes of jazz and the saxophone specifically, that I found my peace of mind. The wail of the sax would take me to New Orleans street corners, where I was strong enough to play with the respected musicians of the city. It took me to gigs where I was free from the hell I was forced to endure and gave me a purpose. Music gave me strength when I had nothing, music helped to save my life.

I am extremely happy to report that I am 6 months in to remission on my cancer. I have consistent follow up appointments with the urology and oncology departments of my facility about every six weeks and my last 3 CT scans have come back with positive results which show no further cancer growth. I did have a scare about a month ago in which I found a lump, similar to the first one found, on my remaining testicle. I tried to remain positive but could only go back to the dark place of treatment and living with cancer and was so scared that my opportunity to live fully was being threatened- again. My oncologist was equally concerned and immediately sent me to have an ultrasound. Thankfully, the results were negative for cancer and the lump proved to be a harmless cyst.

I've been trying to put my life back together since being told I was in remission but being scared like that and having everything about me and my life threatened again really shook me. It made me realize all that I want to achieve and the goals that I want to pursue, the most prevalent of which is learning to play music, specifically, the saxophone. The saxophone is such a powerfully, haunting instrument. I get chills each time I hear someone play. I want to experience that, I want to control sound and command a room, street corner or wherever with the beautiful music of such a fine instrument.

The problem is that I am barely making it. I still have no insurance, I am struggling to pay my rent and can barely keep food on the table. I am beyond grateful to be here today and to have survived cancer but I would like the opportunity to do more than just get by. I need your help to do that.

I'm raising money (or trying to anyway) by sharing my story and my experience and hoping that some of you may be able to identify with me and help get me where I want to be. The amount that I am trying to raise will be just enough to cover an Allora Student Series Tenor saxophone and some private lessons. Your help would mean the world to me. Even if all you have to give is spare change and a hug, I appreciate that and I appreciate you. Your generosity will not go unnoticed and will affect me for the rest of my life.

If you can't donate or simply don't want to- I completely understand and I thank you for your time anyway. At the end of the day and the end of the story, all I hope for is awareness about testicular cancer. It can happen to males in any age, race or weight and it is so important to be aware of that and regularly conduct self examinations. Early detection is everything.

If we never meet, I want you to know that I am so extremely grateful for your time and for the fact that you chose to read about my experience and consider it. You are a wonderful person with or without your donation and I wish nothing but great things for you and your loved ones.

Thank you. Truly.

-Matt.

Organizer

Matthew A. Bogart
Organizer
Torrance, CA

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