Help with transition costs
Donation protected
When I was 13 I was arrested. A friend and I got caught with booze behind the local drugstore. Stupid, I know. It was about 2:30 in the morning and I had to call my dad to pick me up. By the time he got to the police station, the officer and I had spoken at length. I overheard him ask my father something I've never forgotten. "Does he care about anything at all?" My dad was honest with him and answered with, "No, not really." Starting then I was determined to make that true all the time. Boy was I wrong...
This first time I thought about it I was probably around 14 years old...maybe 15. I didn't feel like boys had their fair share of cute clothes. I was jealous of girls because they got to wear such a variety of outfits. I didn't tell anyone these feelings, though, for fear of being mocked and called names and told to "go wear girls clothes then", etc. So, I bottled it up for a while.
I'm 35 now, and through the years I have taken jobs that expect me to look a certain way, girlfriends that are open-minded to a very specific list of things, and friends that are so on the other side of judgmental that there's no possible way I could get hurt. I've kept myself safe and away from harm. I've made sure that I didn't have to really feel anything...to really care about anything.
Last year I did something that was totally out of the ordinary for me: I put myself "out there" to the world. I left myself open to judgement by anyone and everyone that had the internet. I received several comments, but I didn't really get the response that I had hoped for. You see, when I try to do something, and I mean REALLY try to do something, I want a huge impact. I've never done anything in my life that's created an impact that meets the level that I desire. It's always ended up being muted, void, lacking. I throw a party and invite 100 people, zero show up. I make a YouTube video that's supposed to inspire hundreds of people to be true to themselves, I get 6 comments. I tell my little sister that I had big news, she guesses it on the 2nd try (her first guess was me being gay).
I guess my point is: I want to do something truly big...and I want to be able to do it as the person I was meant to be. I want to do it as a woman who, not only looks like she was born a woman, but has the confidence to become a public figure..a symbol, if you will. I want to change the world. You see, I'm a dreamer. I'm one of those people that gets inspired by a song or a movie or having someone else return my wallet because it fell out of my pocket when I was riding my bike in L.A. on my way to hand out my resume. I believe karma has us all by our metaphorical balls and if we're good, decent people, good things will come our way. I am no longer the little boy who didn't really care about anything at all. I care a great deal about a lot of things, and I just want to be able to do something about some of them.
So, here's where you all come into play, as I can't do this alone. I need your help..yes, you! Hey, you over there behind the person reading this...I need your help too! I work a full-time job in the greater Portland area of Oregon. I pay my own bills, take the bus to get to and from work/everywhere, i sleep on a used twin bed, and I can buy something small like a new pair of jeans every once in a while so I don't go insane. i can afford my life the way it is right now. There in lies the problem though. Becoming the person that I was born to be isn't cheap. I am on hormones currently, and thanks to insurance through my job, I can afford that too. Anything else, though, is WAY out of my price range. there are over a dozen procedures that I'll need to get and I can't even begin to be able to afford any of them. I need help...and a lot of it. So, what I'm asking of you is anything at all you can do. Whether it's 5 bucks or asking your friends to help or what, anything would be appreciated.
Thank you all for reading my story and for all the help!
<3's all around
-Morgan
This first time I thought about it I was probably around 14 years old...maybe 15. I didn't feel like boys had their fair share of cute clothes. I was jealous of girls because they got to wear such a variety of outfits. I didn't tell anyone these feelings, though, for fear of being mocked and called names and told to "go wear girls clothes then", etc. So, I bottled it up for a while.
I'm 35 now, and through the years I have taken jobs that expect me to look a certain way, girlfriends that are open-minded to a very specific list of things, and friends that are so on the other side of judgmental that there's no possible way I could get hurt. I've kept myself safe and away from harm. I've made sure that I didn't have to really feel anything...to really care about anything.
Last year I did something that was totally out of the ordinary for me: I put myself "out there" to the world. I left myself open to judgement by anyone and everyone that had the internet. I received several comments, but I didn't really get the response that I had hoped for. You see, when I try to do something, and I mean REALLY try to do something, I want a huge impact. I've never done anything in my life that's created an impact that meets the level that I desire. It's always ended up being muted, void, lacking. I throw a party and invite 100 people, zero show up. I make a YouTube video that's supposed to inspire hundreds of people to be true to themselves, I get 6 comments. I tell my little sister that I had big news, she guesses it on the 2nd try (her first guess was me being gay).
I guess my point is: I want to do something truly big...and I want to be able to do it as the person I was meant to be. I want to do it as a woman who, not only looks like she was born a woman, but has the confidence to become a public figure..a symbol, if you will. I want to change the world. You see, I'm a dreamer. I'm one of those people that gets inspired by a song or a movie or having someone else return my wallet because it fell out of my pocket when I was riding my bike in L.A. on my way to hand out my resume. I believe karma has us all by our metaphorical balls and if we're good, decent people, good things will come our way. I am no longer the little boy who didn't really care about anything at all. I care a great deal about a lot of things, and I just want to be able to do something about some of them.
So, here's where you all come into play, as I can't do this alone. I need your help..yes, you! Hey, you over there behind the person reading this...I need your help too! I work a full-time job in the greater Portland area of Oregon. I pay my own bills, take the bus to get to and from work/everywhere, i sleep on a used twin bed, and I can buy something small like a new pair of jeans every once in a while so I don't go insane. i can afford my life the way it is right now. There in lies the problem though. Becoming the person that I was born to be isn't cheap. I am on hormones currently, and thanks to insurance through my job, I can afford that too. Anything else, though, is WAY out of my price range. there are over a dozen procedures that I'll need to get and I can't even begin to be able to afford any of them. I need help...and a lot of it. So, what I'm asking of you is anything at all you can do. Whether it's 5 bucks or asking your friends to help or what, anything would be appreciated.
Thank you all for reading my story and for all the help!
<3's all around
-Morgan
Organizer
Morgan K Evans
Organizer
Beaverton, OR
