Survival for Venka

$1,300 of $15,000 goal

Raised by 2 people in 11 months
Created August 12, 2018
Team Venka
On November 29, 2016 she suffered a brain injury. Her brain was deprived oxygen for a time and brain death occurred. Blocked arteries, apnea, a pillow over her face? No. A Doctor is trying to figure that out now in August 2018. No one thought it was worth finding out until she got new medical coverage. She can't work, can't "think" as she used to. She has changed and it upsets her because she doesn't know why or what happened to her. She is almost alone in this world, except for a few of us who care too much and want our old friend with us again. Please help to keep her with us. She has filed for Social Security and is waiting for the final decision, whenever that will be.
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I've been saying stroke, but that doesn't say much. My brain had no blood or oxygen for several several minutes, killed part of my brain, but didn't kill me.

Why I wonder why I didn't die, because this life now is a slow death march. And there is nothing I cam do but continue marching.

I don't want to die, but starting over at my age with my medical issues and living in the Bay Area, a room with a cot is all I'll have. Everything I own is will be sold at auctiom because I can't pay the rent. My stuff has an apartment, but humans can't live there.

Life pretty much sucks now. No, I won't commit suicide. Yet. I'm still "hopeful". Pessimistic bull pucky, but there you have it.

If I could qualify for a loan, I'd do that, but my credit score is shot, have no job - Michael's is probably a no-go due to that bogus 5150 from January in which I hit no-one and am.not violent, but lie Damn Bitch - my mind is so jumbled and processes top much. It drains me. I passed out for 1 1/2 hours and have no recollection I even laid down. I was booting up my laptop.

How do you live a normal life when you can't do daily tasks without having to take a nap? When you can't think more than one thing at a time or forget what you were doing or going to do?

I hate this. I'm a logical, rational woman and I'm neither anymore.

Can't even drive withour GPS telling me where to go. I get lost when I'm out for a walk if I don't just keep making right hand turns when I get to the corner.

It sucks being alive and not doing any of the things you were used to doing.
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I saw a neurologist today. Finally!

He is thorough and picky and I love that! Someone like me, or how I was before the stroke. He will be testing me until he knows why I had the stroke. A 51-year old woman doesn't have such issues out of the blue!

Yeah, tell me about it. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away either. If I had a few minutes in private with a couple of doctor's and a nurse practitioner, I would let them now - verbally - that they ruined my life.

I have severe cognitive impairment. I figured. Now there are tests that he will conduct that will determine how bad. And what I can expect in the future. An answer - finally.

I haven't made this up and I have serious problems. A Finance Professional who can't do basic 3rd grade math? I don't think so.

Though I am trying to find a job, even with my disability, I can't do this on my own and succeed. I need fianncial help to get through this.

I have someone who can help me. I still need others. Please help if you can.
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I have medical appointment with Doctors! I saw a Cardiologist who informed me the tests and scans that tool place WHEN I HAD THE STROKE. Good information that would have been very useful in the aftermath of the stroke - NOT TWO YEARS LATER. Even the medications, I know why I was prescribed them from what the scans showed - to help avoid more serious medical issues later.

I am thankful for having met with him and receiving this information. I have a strong heart and my BP is normal for ME. I have data that he could review to make that determination. My fastidious record keeping comes in handy once more. One thing I can still do.

I am still looking for a part time job. I've applied to Michael's the craft store. I'm getting letters from the storage unit managers that at 90 days they will be putting locks on the units, doing inventory, and preparing to sell the contents. I have received some funds (thank you- thank you - thank you), but it can't go to just them. I still have car insurance and a cell bill - i paid them the monthly amount a few days late and incurred a late few. They want that too. It's just piling on and I can't handle it, now with my reduced brain capacity. It's too much to handle alone with no way out.

Please, whatever you can spare, it won't be spent flippantly or uselessly or for "fun stuff". I'm too practical for that. Responsibility first always.
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I confirmed today that I have referrals to endocrinology and neurology, but also cardiology! Something that was done never in Contra Costa County. Also psychiatry and nutrition.

Imagine! Diagnosing a person before prescribing medication. So rational. Not educated guesswork based on sole medical opinion without consulting the patient or understanding her condition. Oh wait, that would require conversing with a patient and that's a waste of time.

It is refreshing to be heard and spoken to like I may know something about me. Or that I understand words.

I pray for diagnosis. Knowing what is wrong will give me closure or a path. Something to work with. Still doesn't alleviate my current sitiation, but it will give me a picture of my future.

And who to sue first.
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$1,300 of $15,000 goal

Raised by 2 people in 11 months
Created August 12, 2018
Team Venka
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