Keep Kayla Alive
Donation protected
Please Help Keep Kayla Alive
While I don’t expect this GoFundMe appeal to generate much cash, it would be a literal lifeline for us. “All” I am hoping to accomplish is to help my wife, Kayla, feel like this life with me is still worth living. I know it sounds strange, but if you can read this to the end, it will make sense.
See, Kayla had no money to her name and needed out of an abusive situation when we met and fell in love online. We are from different countries, and without me realising strict income rules would be an issue, I flew out to her, fell even deeper in love in person, and asked her to marry me...
I swept her away, bringing her back to my homeland, all proud and happy and hopeful, thinking I was saving her, rather than simply creating new life-threatening problems.
Thinking it would be easy enough, I brought my now-wife back to live with me in a room at my mother’s, but it only took three weeks for both to feel the culture shock and stress and we had to get out. Suddenly, I was having us live off my credit cards and a self-editing business online, which turned out to be like walking the scariest tightrope with all the cancellations and perpetual postponements from writers. As a single man in my mother’s spare room it had been simple to make rent and food bills, but I found us struggling to find an economical domicile along with the new regulations for income facing us.
I found a way to try Spain as a ‘quick fix’, but the conditions were horrific and we had to leave earlier than expected, and again, after only a few weeks there, we were flying back, having maxed out my credit cards with all the flights and travelling that hadn’t gotten us anywhere closer to settling.
Instead, we felt country-less, as neither wanted us when so poor. Near to broke and unable to have a place to settle for me to find a job and help us get afloat, the only option we found at the time was an old friend of Kayla’s who said we could use their spare room and second car so my wife could get a job and save up while we stayed in their guest bedroom. So, off to my wife’s country we went.
Unfortunately, they never got that car running and available to us, even though my wife managed to find three different job opportunities, but none could be accepted without transportation. We left there in worse shape financially than when we arrived.
So, after my initial flight to meet the love of my life, our flights back to my country, then our flights to (useless) Spain, then flying back to my country and then back over to my wife’s again, I was totally out of money and we had to return to mine on a crisis loan from a close friend.
Once back, we were living in youth hostels...
(looking at Kayla in above bunk)
...and counting change for a Cup-O-Soup or bagel. It was difficult to not cry all the time while making this my sweet wife’s reality… sleeping on bunk beds, using communal toilets, living out of suitcases and never having enough food. Desperate, I wrote to my mother-in-law asking for a loan to help us out of the mess; their reply was that they could help, but wouldn’t. Then I begged my mother to let us back so I could fix this for us and she agreed… but only for a few weeks.
It was at this time, when I was hitting the pavement for employment, that I found the issue of address holding me back. Though having a home together is all we have dreamed about since getting married, we’ve been living like gypsies, never able to stay in one place for long. And, even though in her country it was easy to find employment, mine needs you to have an address to do anything at all… to work or have a place to live (ironic but true). Without one you can remain homeless and penniless forever. Even though we had my mother’s to lay our heads at night for a little while, I couldn’t use her address on forms, making it virtually impossible to find work, other than the tightrope editing online I’m still barely hanging on to.
I was able to save just enough to get us into a shared room in a different city, and then establish help from the government to cover most of the rent. The only problem was, the renter lied, and changed things unfairly, making it impossible for us to stay more than a few weeks, so back we went to homelessness.
And can you believe it… it was Kayla’s ex-boyfriend (who happened to be from my country) that came through to give us somewhere to sleep. He even got us off his living room sofa and into a shed in the garden with a bed in it for privacy and comfort.
It blows my mind how he could do it, but it sure showed me why she loved him dearly, with that kind of a big heart, and why he is now one of my favourite people on the planet. He has been so cool, not asking for a thing from us for helping us survive every day. The only problem was, it again awarded me no address to give for employment and government help, so my sweet wife has been living in a shed for over a year now. Yes, a shed. For over a year.
Even though she knows it could be worse, and she tries not to complain about not having enough, it’s a depression she’s been fighting, and is now losing. See, Kayla used to drive, sing, play sports, had family to visit, different foods she loved were available, she had her own house to clean and a garden to grow vegetables. And she loved it. These are all things I guess we can take for granted. I know I used to. And yet, these all are no longer options in her life. Instead, I’ve dragged her around the world, taken her away from all the things she used to love, and got her stuck somewhere in my country, not feeling welcome. She is scared to even be heard or seen by anyone for fear she will be shipped back when I can’t afford to get a ticket and follow behind her. Frustrated how she can’t get a job and help us out of this situation, she lives in sadness and fear while keeping a smile on her face most of the time, so as (as she would put it) not to ruin someone else’s time just because she is hurting too.
Kayla is a beautiful, loving soul.
She has lost everything, from all the material possessions left behind, but also the fun things she used to do, plus all the family (including new grandbaby) and friends that have just dropped her since she left. Almost like: out of sight, out of mind. It was already tough for her to be ignored by all her male friends just for getting involved with me, but she is really feeling cornered and abused by life and I’m worried for her. I can’t even get her medical help when she needs it since she isn’t supposed to be here. She’s had a lump in her breast for over a year, but we can’t afford a mammogram, so we worry. Man, it’s hard not to question a society that can boldly say, “That woman is worthy of a mammogram but not THIS woman.”
It’s just not fair what has happened to her, by everyone and everything in her life, and now all she feels about herself is that she is just a cancer for people, taking up air and wasting food and money on her. All of the dreams she once had about the two of us in our own place, as a proper married couple, have never been experienced fully by us, and she doesn’t think it’s ever going to happen as now she is feeling lost.
Though she loves her time with me, to love herself she needs to set herself free of life’s chains, binding her from having anything more, and saving others from showing her how they don’t care about us. Her own close friends and family have not offered any help over this last year. Today, she has been missing online for more than a week, and yet only one friend --no other acquaintances, friends or family-- has contacted me to ask how she is doing. For someone who offers the utmost honesty, heart and love to every person in every moment of every day, this blows my mind. And hurts both our hearts.
So, what I’m really asking/hoping for with this GoFundMe appeal is love and support, from and to the heart. Kayla could use a huge dose of love while she is still asked to live in this mess I keep creating. She has always been a mighty strong woman, but I am scared. And I am hoping this will help just as much as a hug. (Thanks, but I can take care of THAT part.)
Thank you for your time.
Like I said at the beginning, I’m not expecting this GoFundMe appeal to raise much money, although that money could mean so much, so far as literally saving two lives. But, because an amount must be used for these pages, I chose £2500.
This isn’t some random figure, but one I calculate will enable us to begin again in the ideal situation, being back in Kayla’s home town, where she knows how to survive and thrive, and where she can do all these things that I have "helped" to make disappear for almost two years.
Today, Kayla is a caged bird. She cannot sing, she cannot walk with her head high or her voice sparking in the sun. She cannot do any of the things that made her the wonderful woman I met and fell in love with. I still love her more every day, yet I am sad to say that I fear I am slowly killing her. My dream is for her to sing and dance again, to re-find her old self. Hell, I would love to simply see her with a spring in her step and the truest smile on her face.
This figure would allow me to travel with her and set up home there, including the rent and deposit for our own small trailer or apartment, allowing us the opportunity to do things right this time around.
"All" we want is a chance to live the dream we have all come to believe in… a place to call home, and a hand to hold while doing it. For us, this really would be a dream come true. I am struggling to provide this for my wife, so I am down on my knees for the second time in two years... Yes, the first was when I asked Kayla to marry me. This one is to beg you to help me. To help us.
I know we all have our struggles in this life, but Kayla has helped and loved so many people in so many ways over so many years, and deserves a little love circling back toward her big (but heavy) heart. I am ashamed to say I am failing her now, and I need your help to put us back on a path we can keep following.
I hope you can spare us a little love. But, even if you can't donate yourself, please share our link and story, in the hope someone who reads it can and will.
We wish you peace and happiness.
Dave n Kayla x
While I don’t expect this GoFundMe appeal to generate much cash, it would be a literal lifeline for us. “All” I am hoping to accomplish is to help my wife, Kayla, feel like this life with me is still worth living. I know it sounds strange, but if you can read this to the end, it will make sense.
See, Kayla had no money to her name and needed out of an abusive situation when we met and fell in love online. We are from different countries, and without me realising strict income rules would be an issue, I flew out to her, fell even deeper in love in person, and asked her to marry me...
I swept her away, bringing her back to my homeland, all proud and happy and hopeful, thinking I was saving her, rather than simply creating new life-threatening problems.
Thinking it would be easy enough, I brought my now-wife back to live with me in a room at my mother’s, but it only took three weeks for both to feel the culture shock and stress and we had to get out. Suddenly, I was having us live off my credit cards and a self-editing business online, which turned out to be like walking the scariest tightrope with all the cancellations and perpetual postponements from writers. As a single man in my mother’s spare room it had been simple to make rent and food bills, but I found us struggling to find an economical domicile along with the new regulations for income facing us.
I found a way to try Spain as a ‘quick fix’, but the conditions were horrific and we had to leave earlier than expected, and again, after only a few weeks there, we were flying back, having maxed out my credit cards with all the flights and travelling that hadn’t gotten us anywhere closer to settling.
Instead, we felt country-less, as neither wanted us when so poor. Near to broke and unable to have a place to settle for me to find a job and help us get afloat, the only option we found at the time was an old friend of Kayla’s who said we could use their spare room and second car so my wife could get a job and save up while we stayed in their guest bedroom. So, off to my wife’s country we went.
Unfortunately, they never got that car running and available to us, even though my wife managed to find three different job opportunities, but none could be accepted without transportation. We left there in worse shape financially than when we arrived.
So, after my initial flight to meet the love of my life, our flights back to my country, then our flights to (useless) Spain, then flying back to my country and then back over to my wife’s again, I was totally out of money and we had to return to mine on a crisis loan from a close friend.
Once back, we were living in youth hostels...
(looking at Kayla in above bunk)...and counting change for a Cup-O-Soup or bagel. It was difficult to not cry all the time while making this my sweet wife’s reality… sleeping on bunk beds, using communal toilets, living out of suitcases and never having enough food. Desperate, I wrote to my mother-in-law asking for a loan to help us out of the mess; their reply was that they could help, but wouldn’t. Then I begged my mother to let us back so I could fix this for us and she agreed… but only for a few weeks.
It was at this time, when I was hitting the pavement for employment, that I found the issue of address holding me back. Though having a home together is all we have dreamed about since getting married, we’ve been living like gypsies, never able to stay in one place for long. And, even though in her country it was easy to find employment, mine needs you to have an address to do anything at all… to work or have a place to live (ironic but true). Without one you can remain homeless and penniless forever. Even though we had my mother’s to lay our heads at night for a little while, I couldn’t use her address on forms, making it virtually impossible to find work, other than the tightrope editing online I’m still barely hanging on to.
I was able to save just enough to get us into a shared room in a different city, and then establish help from the government to cover most of the rent. The only problem was, the renter lied, and changed things unfairly, making it impossible for us to stay more than a few weeks, so back we went to homelessness.
And can you believe it… it was Kayla’s ex-boyfriend (who happened to be from my country) that came through to give us somewhere to sleep. He even got us off his living room sofa and into a shed in the garden with a bed in it for privacy and comfort.
It blows my mind how he could do it, but it sure showed me why she loved him dearly, with that kind of a big heart, and why he is now one of my favourite people on the planet. He has been so cool, not asking for a thing from us for helping us survive every day. The only problem was, it again awarded me no address to give for employment and government help, so my sweet wife has been living in a shed for over a year now. Yes, a shed. For over a year.
Even though she knows it could be worse, and she tries not to complain about not having enough, it’s a depression she’s been fighting, and is now losing. See, Kayla used to drive, sing, play sports, had family to visit, different foods she loved were available, she had her own house to clean and a garden to grow vegetables. And she loved it. These are all things I guess we can take for granted. I know I used to. And yet, these all are no longer options in her life. Instead, I’ve dragged her around the world, taken her away from all the things she used to love, and got her stuck somewhere in my country, not feeling welcome. She is scared to even be heard or seen by anyone for fear she will be shipped back when I can’t afford to get a ticket and follow behind her. Frustrated how she can’t get a job and help us out of this situation, she lives in sadness and fear while keeping a smile on her face most of the time, so as (as she would put it) not to ruin someone else’s time just because she is hurting too.
Kayla is a beautiful, loving soul.
She has lost everything, from all the material possessions left behind, but also the fun things she used to do, plus all the family (including new grandbaby) and friends that have just dropped her since she left. Almost like: out of sight, out of mind. It was already tough for her to be ignored by all her male friends just for getting involved with me, but she is really feeling cornered and abused by life and I’m worried for her. I can’t even get her medical help when she needs it since she isn’t supposed to be here. She’s had a lump in her breast for over a year, but we can’t afford a mammogram, so we worry. Man, it’s hard not to question a society that can boldly say, “That woman is worthy of a mammogram but not THIS woman.”
It’s just not fair what has happened to her, by everyone and everything in her life, and now all she feels about herself is that she is just a cancer for people, taking up air and wasting food and money on her. All of the dreams she once had about the two of us in our own place, as a proper married couple, have never been experienced fully by us, and she doesn’t think it’s ever going to happen as now she is feeling lost.
Though she loves her time with me, to love herself she needs to set herself free of life’s chains, binding her from having anything more, and saving others from showing her how they don’t care about us. Her own close friends and family have not offered any help over this last year. Today, she has been missing online for more than a week, and yet only one friend --no other acquaintances, friends or family-- has contacted me to ask how she is doing. For someone who offers the utmost honesty, heart and love to every person in every moment of every day, this blows my mind. And hurts both our hearts.
So, what I’m really asking/hoping for with this GoFundMe appeal is love and support, from and to the heart. Kayla could use a huge dose of love while she is still asked to live in this mess I keep creating. She has always been a mighty strong woman, but I am scared. And I am hoping this will help just as much as a hug. (Thanks, but I can take care of THAT part.)
Thank you for your time.
Like I said at the beginning, I’m not expecting this GoFundMe appeal to raise much money, although that money could mean so much, so far as literally saving two lives. But, because an amount must be used for these pages, I chose £2500.
This isn’t some random figure, but one I calculate will enable us to begin again in the ideal situation, being back in Kayla’s home town, where she knows how to survive and thrive, and where she can do all these things that I have "helped" to make disappear for almost two years.
Today, Kayla is a caged bird. She cannot sing, she cannot walk with her head high or her voice sparking in the sun. She cannot do any of the things that made her the wonderful woman I met and fell in love with. I still love her more every day, yet I am sad to say that I fear I am slowly killing her. My dream is for her to sing and dance again, to re-find her old self. Hell, I would love to simply see her with a spring in her step and the truest smile on her face.
This figure would allow me to travel with her and set up home there, including the rent and deposit for our own small trailer or apartment, allowing us the opportunity to do things right this time around.
"All" we want is a chance to live the dream we have all come to believe in… a place to call home, and a hand to hold while doing it. For us, this really would be a dream come true. I am struggling to provide this for my wife, so I am down on my knees for the second time in two years... Yes, the first was when I asked Kayla to marry me. This one is to beg you to help me. To help us.
I know we all have our struggles in this life, but Kayla has helped and loved so many people in so many ways over so many years, and deserves a little love circling back toward her big (but heavy) heart. I am ashamed to say I am failing her now, and I need your help to put us back on a path we can keep following.
I hope you can spare us a little love. But, even if you can't donate yourself, please share our link and story, in the hope someone who reads it can and will.
We wish you peace and happiness.
Dave n Kayla x
Organiser
David Burton
Organiser
