For The Love Of Elizabeth

This is a joint campaign for a cry for hope for both my Mom, Elizabeth, and myself. To give my Mom hope to see me again as at 90 years old, every day counts. Many of you have asked why the account is in Euros and not $. I am not a citizen yet, but do have a BOA account and have to follow GFM guidelines. 

UPDATE: For those of you in the US and Canada, I have set up an account today in $ over on another site . And payment is immediate which means we will have a home for Christmas. We appreciate all, never mind how little and once I am back on my feet, so to speak and working full time, I would like to begin paying all of you back over time for your kindness. 

Writing my Mom and my story despite having lived through it so long, is one of the hardest moments of my life as we are so fiercely guarded of our private lives. However, neither my Mom, nor I, can carry on without help any longer. My Mom is fading fast and I need to see her despite my own injuries and lack of funds due to my medical expenses.

My Dad passed away in 1999 and my Mom despite her years of fighting cancer on and off, was still fiercely independent despite being slightly disabled, due to extreme osteoporosis and the lack of movement in her left arm due to cancer. She pushed me to make a life for myself abroad due to her worries about the future of Southern Africa and lack of employment there. 

In Sept of 2012. I was working abroad and called out on an emergency flight to be with my Mom. However, suffering from heart issues, my Mom was rushed to hospital Somerset West. Adopted or not, she is the only Mom I know and love. I was eventually allowed to bring her home despite her being extremely weak.
We battled on and my Mom became stronger or so I thought. I heard her crying one day in the bathroom and discovered my Mom's entire bowel had prolapsed and what others thought were Hemorrhoids, looked nothing like them. Her Dr organized for two women to help me get my Mom into the car and I raced up to Kingsbury Hospital in Cape Town, with my Mom cushioned as best as possible.

She was prepped for emergency surgery and in wonderful hands but as the surgeon told me afterwards, he opened up my Mom and their was nothing he could do but lift her bowel.  My Mom's weight dropped down to around 33 kilograms (72 pounds) and she suffered a mild stroke in ICU. Around six months of intensive care and Doctors treatments, in Cape Town, my Mom was allowed home.

I cannot put into words just how devastating all of this was to my Mom, myself and my immediate family. The heart and bowel operations took their toll on her.  My Mom has lost the use of her legs. I was told it was the trauma of the operations at her age. I could no longer nurse my Mom on my own and she was moved to a local Frail Care which many of her friends from childhood were in too, so thankfully she was not completely alone, however, it was not what I had wanted for my Mom, I wish I could have done more.

I remained out there for a year and then through persuasion from my Mom and a friend in Europe, I returned, not to Italy where I had been working, but temporarily to Spain, a country I had never visited before. I decided to honor my Mom's wishes and to work in Europe again to pay for my Mom's further medical expenses. Employment for me where she is, was impossible, nor would it have covered all.

Soon after arriving in Spain, the car I was a passenger in, was hit at speed from the back on my side while stationary at a yield sign just off a freeway. The airbag never opened and both my knees hit the dashboard. One of my hips and and knee were broken, the other knee and hip serverely hurt. I also had neck and spine injuries.

I was treated appallingly by the insurance company of the speeding driver as they made it clear they did not like "foreigners". I spent nine months in what can only be classified as a cloud of pain h*ll, enduring constant physio and almost everything imagineable to "fix" me, other than surgery. I was not paid out for my injuries, apart from to cover the physio and thankfully to a no win no fee lawyer, I received enough for intense sessions of accupuncture treatments and osteopathy.

However, none of this worked apart from my headaches lessoning due to the accupuncture. Eventually after nearly a year of constant pain, missing my Mom intensely and constant worry about my health and hers, I was accepted by a medical insurance company to have a full hip replacement (I am no longer insured). 

I was wheeled into surgery and told that I was way too high risk to have a full anaesthetic and an epidural would be fine. A few hours later, full hip replacement posterior surgery done, they discovered that not only had the surgeon damaged my thigh area where he had operated, but my entire leg including my foot on that site had major nerve damage. Every day I am in extreme pain from the surgical site, nerves in that leg and from the screw which "holds" it all together.


Between the surgeon's errors (including not measuring me prior to surgery) and the epidural damaging my L5 and L3 areas of my spine, I was unable to walk properly and my left foot sent me into tears anytime I tried to stand, the pain was so severe.

There is no shortening of the medical side of our stories without cutting out information which is relevant. I was unable to have physio post my operation due to the injuries incurred during it. Yes, I signed the waiver form prior to surgery as we all do, no way of gaining anything from the hospital.  

Above you can see the screw which causes me searing pain 24/7. My left hip is constantly on fire. It took me nearly two years to begin to walk again. My wish is 'For The Love Of Elizabeth' Go Fund Me to ensure I heal physically to see my Mom before it is too late for either of us. The surgeon I will go to for my corrective surgery and other treatments, is in Santa Monica.
He has operated on two friends I made through instagram while laying in hospital. Both were injured during car accidents like me, if any of you need more information to who he is, please feel free to contact me. There recovery time post op, was super fast for my friends and they had 0 complications. Both are dancing now and physically stronger than prior to their injuries.

Here I am with Christmas round the corner and almost two months of extremely costly travel to see Specialists who I have hoped can help me. I learned from a wonderful physiotherapist in the States, that the pain in my knees is severe scar tissue which is stopping my knee caps from having any movement whatsoever.

Now I have no permanent home due to having to see a specialist Dr abroad unexpectedly this past October for an unrelated medical issues and having to rest before flying again as sitting on a plane, the pain is overwhelming . Thankfully just before more medical costs arose, I managed to find a budger apartment.

Returning to my local Dr will mean his treatments will enable me to get temporarily strong enough to fly to my Mom and spend time a few weeks with her while she is still with us as she turned 90 in November. My determination to keep my promise to my Mom's nurse which I made on my her birthday, 27th November, to see her again once I can move with less pain and to walk as I used to prior to the car accident, is something I wish to keep.

Below you can see a pic of my Mom and I together and for those of you who don't know me, a pic of myself grown up now. That was shot on a pain free day, a miracle in itself as I cannot hide my pain, I may just shock some of you if you were to see what I look like when in pain.

No one should have to go it alone. When I realized I need to make it public that I need financial help with my medical expenses and for the accomodation/transport, needed while I am having the treatments, I could not imagine how I would begin to tell you all my story.

Writing about myself has never been my forte, especially as am known as a woman warrior, the nickname which always makes me smile as it reminds me of my amazing Mom, her determination and strength despite the odds. 

However, as one of my oldest friends said, no one can tell someone else's story from the heart better than the one who lived it... so here I am, asking for understanding, medical and accomocation help, the hope to see my Mom again and a roof over my head for Christmas and until my medical treatments are complete.

Thank you to all of you for listening, being here for understanding and giving us hope, L