Support for the Dealan-de Family

Hi, my name is Chrisstine, and I'm raising funds to help Maia Dealan-de and her teenage children. The children's father, Adam Dealan-de, suddenly and unexpectedly died last week.

Some of you may know Adam as "The Bagel Guy" and the owner of Adam's Bagels. He was also a beloved father, brother, son, uncle, friend, ecstatic dancer, men’s-group leader, activist, podcaster, artist, comedian, spiritual seeker… and always, unapologetically himself.

On March 28th, Adam woke at 4 a.m. to head into the commercial kitchen, ready to bake the day’s orders. A couple of hours later, while rolling out the last of the bagels, he experienced chest pain.

An ambulance arrived very quickly, but unfortunately - Adam lost consciousness before any of his friends or family could arrive. And then, due to untreated hypertension and an aortic embolism, he also lost his life.

He was 48 years old.

Adam’s passing was a shock to everyone who loved him. On top of his family’s shock and grief, his loss brings about a financial burden that has left them reeling.

Like many, Adam and Maia experienced some serious financial setbacks during the stress of the pandemic years. Those setbacks, combined with the rapidly rising cost of housing here in Olympia, meant that both of their incomes were necessary to maintain the home they provided for their children. Unfortunately, it’s become clear that Adam won’t have assets left to assist with the ongoing support of his children.

A Little History

Adam and Maia met shortly after 9/11, brought together by a mutual friend.

Over the next twenty-two years, Adam and Maia experienced several business ventures, two amazing children, several moves, one divorce, and an abiding friendship that transcended their diverging interests becoming what family is always meant to be. They stayed committed to supporting each other's dreams and giving their children the best that they had to offer.

Most recently, this has meant making a home together again. Without the funds Adam was contributing to the household, Maia is facing an immediate and challenging short-term budget.

The Road Ahead

Maia is self-employed as a writer. She is earning a consistent income and is formulating a clear plan to increase her output while absorbing this expanded role as sole financial support for her teenage children.

The reality is, there is a two-month lag between her publishing cycle and when payment is issued. She is also needing to be realistic about how the stress and grief will impact her ability to focus in the short term and the need to be emotionally available for her kids as they all navigate a new normal.

There is also the harsh reality that she may not be able to keep her children in the home and school district they’ve spent half their lives in.

This community has already come together beautifully to express their love and grief over Adam’s passing. Even though many didn’t know Maia personally, most of those closest to Adam know how much having a home with her and their children again has meant to him.

Over the last few months of his life, Adam was able to be a part of his teenagers’ lives as they navigated part-time jobs, explored continuing his legacy of social activism, debated high school and college courses, dissected the lyrics of local punk bands, took up the electric guitar, started a book club, got him hooked on the local taco trucks, binge watched The Last of Us with him (even on the nights Adam knew he had to get up at 4 a.m. to do bagels), and pushed him to learn how to become a better advocate for transgender rights and a better ally to the LGBTQ+ community as a whole.

Adam reveled in all of it… but he won’t get to see what comes next.

He won’t see his oldest graduate from high school next year or his second child enroll in driver’s ed this summer. He won’t get to see the bond strengthen and grow between his two teenagers and his youngest daughter - the three-year-old bundle of joy and sunshine who often “helped” him with bagels - as the three of them weave in and out of each other's lives in all the years to come. He won’t be able to follow through with his promise to take them to New York, have a garage sale with them this summer, or finally master a gluten-free bagel recipe for Avis.

He will leave a legacy in each of his children and the greater Olympia community.

The world is a little emptier without Adam in it, and a lot less colorful. He will be missed.

All funds raised here will be used to keep his family in their home and stabilize them over the next 4-5 months. This will greatly assist as Maia works to make up for the loss of Adam’s financial contribution and as the family moves through their grieving process. There is a very real and immediate need, so please consider donating any amount that feels good to you. Whether or not you are in a position to donate, sharing this campaign with others is a huge help!

Whether you've been touched by Adam’s kindness, his delicious bagels, or his infectious joy on the dance floor, let's help support his family through this transition!

Much love and thanks,

Chrisstine