For Sophia's story written by her mother Tatiana Aguilar, please read below.
Have you ever wondered why things happen to people? Like, why him? He was such a good guy. Or poor her, she was so young and innocent. Some people who believe in God say, he did it for a reason. Others who have their own beliefs, claim the cards were not in their favor. But no one ever finds out why. I'll probably never find out why my little girl was chosen to have the life she's going to live, but maybe I can show her that her life will always be worth living with everyones support. May 2 2013, I was induced around 8:30 am. I wasn't even scared. I was ready. The emotional bond I got with my daughter during my pregnancy changed my entire mindset on love. I didn't even know her, hadn't even met her but I did everything I could to protect her during my pregnancy. From reading nutrition labels to holding my breath around people who smoke. I loved and protected her as much as I could, yet I didn't even know her. I had a perfect pregnancy, although I was 17, I had no problems. The delievery was painful, but problem free. Sophia was born at 11:58 p.m. on May 2 2013. I'll never forget the first time I saw her, I was speechless. Still in physical pain, but my heart was pounding because I had finally met the love of my life. Everything was fine even after the delivery. Sophia cried throughout the entire night. With every single movement, a cry would follow. In the morning, she turned purple and was unresponsive. The nurse fed us some excuse, something about amniotic fluid being stuck in her lungs. Around 11 am was when one nurse went to change her diaper & noticed her legs jerking. Long story short, 10 minutes later we were notified that Sophia was having seizures & she had been sent to the NICU. Rady's children Hospital in San Diego already had an ambulence to come for Sophia. It was all a shock. We had one hour to visit with her and say goodbye, for now. Can you imagine? carrying someone for 9 months just to have her taken away from you in a flash. We went down to Radys Children Hospital where we saw our little Sophia hooked up to numerous moniters, Ivs, & breathing tubes. I blamed myself for the first 4 days.Maybe I was too stressed out, maybe I ate something or was around a smell. I mean she came from me right? How could it not be my fault? Over a course of days they did multiple tests, labs, catscans, mri's, spinal taps, etc on Sophia. Turns out at one point Sophia didn't have oxygen reaching her brain, causing significant brain damage to both sides, resulting in seizures. No one ever wants to hear that their baby might not ever be able to walk, or talk. What about reach out their hand to say hello? Or give a hug? It was heartbreaking. The neurologists informed us that Sophia has a great chance of having Cerbral Palsy in her future, due to all the nerves that were damaged. How do you even grasp those words? I thought so many things, I even resented God at one point. Why her, why my little girl? Of course we cried, hurt & went through our grief. We saw Sophia every single day in San Diego for two weeks straight. We also learned she has epilepsy. We learned how to give her medicine. We learned how to change her diaper without messing up any wires, tubes or cords. I don't think we took one thing for granted in those two weeks. If we saw Sophia move an arm or open an eye, we smiled and smiled. We saw her progress and fight and try. She never lost the will to fight. When things like this happen, we're offered a chance to open our eyes and see the reality of the world we live in. As a parent of any other baby who got to go home after being born, a typical smile would appear when her baby learned how to eat. Being the parent of Sophia, tears filled my eyes when I saw her learn how to eat. We'll never take anything she does for granted or look at it as ordinary. We'll look at it as Sophia still fighting. I will love her no matter what shape or form she has. I will love Sophia no matter what she can or cant do. I will love Sophia no matter what she can or can't say. I will say I love you to Sophia Renae everyday, even if I won't get a response. Every parent wants to see their baby grow, and fall in love, and venture out into the world and I hope to see that happen with my baby girl. For now, I'll love her more and more day by day and I will watch her continue her journey on our earth. I will be next to her side every step of the way. Sophia Renae Goodman is a Miracle. She's here to stay.
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