Single Mom needing help with utilities

hello, first I would like to say that I am a very prideful person, which is why this is so hard for me. Second I am a mother of two amazing children, which is why this is so dire. 

I  recently came into an unexpected situation. My Ex who agreed to help pay my electric and water bill, stopped paying them once he found out that the companies were not shutting anything off due to Covid 19. Therefore leaving me with a massive bill for each. He recently lost his job and has made no attempt to find another. I however started working a second, part time job on top of my regular full time job. Unfortunately I am unable to pay off the massive past due bills with just these two jobs. I have Rent, groceries, car payment, car insurance, gas, and other necessary bills I have to pay alone. I do not like asking for help, but I have no other option at this point. I have applied for assistance programs and even church programs and I am not eligible for any due to "making too much" which is a lie. if I made enough money I wouldn't ask for help. I just need enough money to pay these two bills off, to start fresh. Once these bills are back to normal amounts I will be fine with paying them on my own. 

I have until October 20th to pay my electric bill in full which is $777.35.
The water bill doesn't have a shut off date but I am afraid they will come at anytime to shut it off.  That bill is $454.75. 

I am so afraid they will shut off my electric and water, and like I said I have two children at home, who need electricity and water. My daughter goes to school online like a majority of other children and needs the WIFI for school work and meetings.  I hate that I have to ask others for help, but I am at the end of my rope, my back is against the wall, and I have no other options. I am sick to my stomach with worry, and I am angry at my ex for not speaking up and communicating with me that he couldn't afford the bills or at the very least wasn't paying them. It is my fault however because I allowed myself to believe he was paying them on time, when in fact he was not. Of course we cannot change the past, so here we  are. 

I vow that if I get any help at all from people and meet the deadline for my electric bill and pay off the water bill, that I will pay it forward to someone else in need. 

also, I started the part time job because my full time job does require us to work on the weekends but that is not until thanksgiving and through new years. Any help will be so very much appreciated, and I will be forever grateful to any and all who help me in this awful situation. 

thank you for your time and or donation. 

with love,

The Beckman's
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