Fresh Start

For those of you who don't know, I am on disability. I have two very part time jobs that give me 7.5-12 hours a week. I have a very hard time finding supplemental income because of my limitations.

I made some bad choices and trusted the wrong people. I was trying to help them, but did so at the expense of myself. I have ended up in debt far over my head. I've worked hard to rectify this, but it's more than I can handle. I have gone to the courts and though I got rulings in my favor, getting payment has so far proved impossible. I am losing a large part of it getting help in collecting it and it could take years.

I have worked very hard at trying to manage my debt and sacrificed greatly to put as much money as possible toward that. It has reached the point where I can't even take care of myself. My roommate has been helping me with gas for doctor appointments and keeping us supplied in household things and making sure I have food if I run out of food stamps. This is not fair to her, even though I am extremely grateful. I have also had other friends help me out with things I ought to be responsible for, like buying conditioner and hair clips and contributing to potlucks. I am a burden to those around me.

The stress I have gone through in trying to fix this is more than I can bear. I am emotionally and physically exhausted and am literally destroying my health trying to do the right thing. After much prayer, consideration and seeking counsel, I have decided that the best choice for me and those around me is to file bankruptcy. 

Once that is accomplished, I will have enough monthly income to pay all my own bills, to pay for whatever gas I need, to help with the household supplies, to buy any food beyond what my food stamps cover, to buy personal supplies and whatever else I need. I will no longer be a burden to the people around me. 

I have to start saving everything I can to pay for this. With my income and limitations, it could take me as long as a year and a half and until then, I will still be struggling to try and provide for my basic needs. 

The minimum donation is $5. If I can find 250 people to just give that much, then in three months or less, combined with what I can earn, I'll be able to make this happen. Then I can move forward with a fresh start on life and make the RIGHT choices.

I feel guilty asking for help. This is my mistake, my problem, my consequences. But until it's over, I will continue to be a drain to others. So I am asking for compassion and mercy from those who are willing. 

Please share this with anyone you feel might be willing to help out or would be willing to pass it on to someone who can. Thank you very much!

PS - if you would like to help, but don't trust this site, anything I receive in person or mail or paypal I can apply to the balance on this so it will continue to keep accurate track of how much I still need.

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Shondalae Benson 
Eugene, OR
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