Mum’s End of Life Expenses

It’s a bit ironic that I’m the person who seems best prepared for all of this. Then again I guess my mom did start preparing me for this when I was 14. I’m the oldest of her children.

I was 14 when she was diagnosed with stage four advanced metaticized breast cancer. The doctors estimated that she had two years to live, maximum, and with a terrible, nonexistent quality of life. She fought her cancer. She continued living, loving, and raising her children. She created art, volunteered, went back to school and took college classes working on her bachelor’s degree, wrote and published stories, made many wonderful friends, and loved life and all of the people around her- near and far- with all that was in her.

Then all of these other things: COPD, fibromyalgia, Hashimoto’s thyroid disease, two types of arthritis, kidney disease, type two diabetes, unexplained and undiagnosable fevers, gout, pain, poverty, etc. She was in car accidents where she used her nurse’s instincts and training to save others’ lives even though they caused the accidents. The result was more damage and illness. Countless things that seem like they’d be too much for one person.

It obviously wasn’t too much for her. She did it all. She endeavored to help others daily while enduring more than most people could ever conceive of. She looked for the positive in everything around her. She reached out to others, pinged them, as she put it. (She always was better with technology than I am!)

She has had a powerful, transformative life.

She’s learned and grown and touched so many. She has taught everyone she has encountered just by nature of who she is, how she is, her wit, her sense of humor, her ferocious love, and her insatiable curiosity and interest in the world around her and everyone and everything in it.

She’s pushed, fought, destroyed herself repeatedly for others. There are many more examples than I can list and I’m sure more instances than I’m aware of.

She’s made plenty of mistakes and considers herself to be inadequate in most ways. She worries that she’s fallen so short of her potential. Yet she’s survived unlivable things. She’s managed not to pass down horrible things that typically increase exponentially with each generation.

She sought intelligence and learning in order to change. She metabolized poison. She explored and tried innovative treatments and approaches for every aspect of life in an attempt to find a healthier balance and way of being. Most recently, she had surgery in an attempt to improve her health and quality of life. Things did not go as planned. Instead of improved health and mobility her health has rapidly and fatally declined. Her already limited mobility diminished and she became bedfast, unable to turn, unable to adjust herself in bed, and unable to even sit up without assistance. She was plagued by multiple infections and her organs began shutting down. The last two months of her life were spent in the hospital ICU. Yet through all this she loved others, asked how they were, and did not want to cause anyone undue stress or concern.

She’s accomplished anything she could have possibly agreed to work on in this life.

But now I think she deserves a chance to rest. I want her to be able to have peace, safety, a sense of security, and a deep sense of knowing confirmation that she is loved and more than good enough.

I need financial help to be able to set her things in order so unexpectedly. Thank you very much for your time, attention, caring and love for my Mum, healing energy, prayers, good wishes, sacrificed chickens, burned candles, support, encouragement, friendship, and everything else that has been so generously gifted to us. ❤️
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Charleston, WV
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