Making memories
On the 1st of September, Roderick, my husband, urinated blood clots. Realising that was a bad sign Rod was sent for a day of tests, which resulted an appointment with a Urologist on Fathers day. Rod was booked into surgery on the 4th to remove a growth in his bladder which was blocking the drainage of his left kidney. We were told the chances the growth was cancerous was very high. On the 11th the Urologist revealed the growth was cancerous and further tests were required to determine if it has spread, if so, where to. On the 12th after the tests, the Urologist confirmed the cancer was Micropapillary bladder cancer and had spread to the bladder wall and possibly the lymph nodes. If it was only the bladder, they would have removed his bladder, but because it had spread, Rod had to be referred to an Oncologist. On the 14th we saw an Oncologist to elaborate on Rods cancer. The doctor spoke about everything other than the cancer. About our occupations, our family support, our children. I finally understood he was creating a way to bear bad news, so I asked him why is he asking all this. He told us that Rods situation is not good at all. Rod had a rare type of agressive bladder cancer, that is in Stage IV. It had spread to his lymph nodes and pelvic bone and surgery is impossible as the cancer is attached to the arteries. I asked what we were looking at time wise. If Rod remained untreated he had 6 to 9 months, with treatment the prognosis is very likely terminal. The rest of the day was a blur. We left the doctor and wandered aimlessly and without words to eachother. That evening our shock came out, and we cried in eachothers arms. The next day we had to tell the children as Rod would be embarking on Palleative Chemotherapy the following week, and our lives would now change so drastically, they needed to understand. Skyler, our 9 year old daughter and Zander our 7 year old son listened to what we told them with heavy hearts as a year ago they lost both their grandparents, Rods parents, to cancer. Their first words of concern were, is daddy going to die? We had to explain that the doctors will be doing their best to remove the cancer, even though we know they cannot, knowing the prognosis is poor.
We have spent many evenings since the diagnosis thinking what should we do. A bucket list is one thing that came up. There were a few things we wanted to as a 5 year plan which we now feel we need to fast track in 6 months. Our lives have literally changed overnight. Some days we feel like we are doing great, then other days its a complete flip. I would like to make family memories as best I can. Unfortunately I still have to work a 40 hour week to get paid which only covers the basics. Until I need to start the caring process. Before that happens I would like us as a family to travel Australia and to NZ, but he is limited to maximum a 4 hour flight.
Im setting up this fund me in hope I can provide him amazing experiences and our 2 children lasting memories. Please help me achieve this. Please help me turn a sad, difficult situation into some happier times to remember.
