Make a girls dreams come true

Hello I'm Kabin and and this whole ordeal happened as I was formulating in the womb when my biological gender was decided and I was born a Male :c. So my early childhood was fairly basic, my family grew up poor we just had recently immigrated to the united states because my mom and dad wanted what was best for us, the children.

      I lived a seeming "normal" childhood until I was in elementary school and I realized that I was different from the other boys in my class. I didn't know what but i always felt like I didn't belong and kinda avoided them and hung out with the girls. I always got made fun of for that but I didn't care. Then I saw on TV a kid just like me. He or I should say she was wearing dresses and told all the adults that she also felt like a girl from a early age, that's when I knew what I was feeling my whole life, I was transgender, but that's where it gets weird. My mom was also watching the same show as me and her reaction made me never want to ever tell her how I felt so I hid it from her for over 16 years.

      Well hiding what I was feeling my whole life hindsight wasn't the best choice.
For example every time I my parents forced me to get a hair cut put me in a dark place mental. Well it took me till I was 20 to finally break down crying to tell my parents how I was feeling, and as I expected they did not like what I told them. My moms reaction felt almost dehumanizing (please don't hate for for this shes just very conservative ) so basically I got into a severe depression. So I tried to sleep it off and well the next day came and I still felt the same. So I did something dumb I wasn't in the right state of mind I didn't want to go to work, didn't want to get up, and didn't want to live anymore so I tried to take my own life. Well I failed so I got sent to the Emergency room and a mental ward(Probably the worst experience in my life mental wards suck people should really look into those).

     Well now your basically caught up with my life sorta I'm currently still living with my parents got back into school trying to get my life together. Started HRT January been making progress working out getting more and more happy with my body. But since I still live with my parents and my dad now works for the military we had to move. So I canceled my HRT appointment (I have to go see a doctor for refills) because I was thinking ill get a new doctor when I move and I had 3 months of the hormones left but we were denied the pcs order( its where they relocate military families ) because of the covid19. So I'm right now in Korea and out of hormones and kinda so scared to go out because of the sigma here but I move back to the us.

      So well this is where hopefully you guys come in. I dunno how much you guys know about HRT but it can only do so much and cant change whats physically there. I'm been thinking about this procedure all my life and I really hope you all can contribute to my MtF bottom surgery when the time come.

tldr;  girl born a guy asking for help.
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