Life Saving Surgical Procedure

No where else to turn! In need of a life saving surgical procedure which entails two surgeries, extensive bone grafting, removal of infected areas & has a 16 - 20 week treatment time estimate between surgeries & about 10-12 months of total treatment time start to finish. Not covered by insurance! Payment of $38,000 is required up front or in Five $7,600 payments due at each appointment & surgery. Surgeon/Doctors don't know why I'm still alive, not in the hospital & or still functioning due to the severity of the infection. My answer to this is simple, it's my family. My 1 year old grandson who I care for & spend  7 days a week with & who needs me but not nearly as much as I need him, my 2 children who are both in college & I want to see graduate. My daughter is studying to be an EMT Paramedic & my son is studying for a IT technology degree. I am extremely proud of both of them! My highschool sweetheart of 27 years, soul mate, best friend,  love of my life & husband. My 76 year young Mother who depends on me for so much, my older brother, & hero in my eyes.  And all of my family & friends as well as my faith in God. I have so much to be blessed & thankful for & so many who depend on me every day. I am only 43 years old with so much life left in me & so much to look forward to. I am a fighter & I'm determined to win this battle & to not quit until I have won it! All I want is a chance to live longer & to be & feel better while doing so. I want a chance to do & see all the things I haven't already done & seen. I want a chance to be better at everything. I want a chance to be there for my loved ones. A chance to enjoy all the little things we all take for granted every day. I just want a chance to go on living..... Doctors say without this surgery my time left will be short. Yes, I'm scared but the majority of my fear & all I can think of is my family & what they will do & how will they go on without me. Will my grandson remember me & know how very much I love him? Will I get to be there for my children as they walk across the stage to receive their diplomas? Will I have a chance to grow old with my husband? Am I going to be able to continue caring for my mom? So many questions & so much uncertainty. Makes it hard to get through each day without breaking down but I find a way & the strength to do so. I pray every night for God to allow me another day, & he does. God bless you for taking the time to read this & for sharing it in hopes that our goal will be reached & that I can receive these very important surgeries. Thank you so much for your time & consideration.