Let's Make Alex A Big Red Bear

This story is not about the differences between conservatives and liberals, gay and straight, white and black, this is about the importance of standing against intolerance; for I believe that most Americans, regardless of political affiliation, seek to make this country better. 

In October 2019, my parents left me for dead. Let me be clear, I very carefully use the word "parents" for these people as they are neither my biological, or cultural guardians. Without much warning, they broke off contact, gave me an ultimatum via text message: leave my University to enlist (which they know I'm unable to do for medical reasons) or withdraw to work even though they never considered the monetary consequences of doing so. They left me without any food, shelter, money, or resources. Presently, I am homeless and on NY state benefits. They still have many vital documents like my birth certificate, family history records, medical records, etc. And although they might be my legal guardians, their actions have proven contrary.  

They are two white, racist, homophobes who adopted me. My mom is submissive and what my step-dad says goes. In the end, he calls all the shots. They reveled in their positions as my (white) saviors and made sure I got along, but never enough. Although they did all this, I still love them, but at this time I have to pave my own path because they don't care. 

On the happiest and proudest day of my life in November 2018, when I received my acceptance letter to Cornell University, they were reluctant to help me move to Ithaca and make my way at an elite Ivy League institution. It meant so much to me because I knew that I would be the first of my birth family to go so far. As extremist Christians, they could not allow me to attend what they considered a "northern hotbed of satanic liberalism" that encouraged a “perverse lifestyle”.

Some of you might remember me from a 2016 interview on This American Life ( https://www.thisamericanlife.org/580/thats-one-way-to-do-it ). Well, since that time I have grown and realized what it means to be proud of who I am because I am uniquely made. I do not have to be ashamed of my race, sexuality, or politics. I have grown into a confident black, queer, leftist that fights for equality wherever I see inequalities. My guardians refuse to accept that I am creating a future with values and beliefs separate from their own. 

My whole childhood, I felt internally ashamed of my blackness, when it is beautiful to be African! The only father figure in my life constantly gave excuses for, ignored, or simply disagreed whenever I expressed feelings of sadness at white kids or police treating me as "other". Here's an example: he would drill into my head the false narrative of the Glorious Old South--"happy slaves", while also claiming that America will cease to be great once it is no longer majority White. We would have heated arguments that he would turn into verbal abuse and physical violence. As a kid it was scary. As a man, I now know it is racism and hatred. 

One of the last conversations I had with him, ended with him calling me "a perverted faggot" that he had "no respect" for. 

It is very hard to write about what I’ve experienced, but I’ve had time to reflect. The childhood conversion therapy, fear tactics, threat of abandonment didn’t work. Although their love for me was conditional, I’m still the bright-eyed, cheerful, and confident Alex many of you know. 

I have always had a passion to help others, especially disadvantaged communities of color. My dream is to be a lawyer, businessman that helps young people reach their greatest sense of self, in spite of the doubting that the world will inevitably cast at them. My Cornell degree is a major step toward that end. Anything you are able to contribute will be greatly appreciated. The funds will help me return to school possibly by Fall 2020!  When I was left without any financial help, my fraternity dues had been left unpaid. These dues caused Cornell to place a hold on my status as a student. The remainder will be put toward repairs of my car—still held up at an auto shop in Philadelphia--clothes, some legal documents such as my passport, and other essentials that are in my car.

When the University realized that my "parents" would not pay the bill, it was determined that I would be considered an "independent student". This means once my debts are cleared, I will be able to return fulltime without cost. The fraternity room and board were covered by my financial aid package but later retracted without explanation by the University. So in order for me to return as a fulltime student, this debt has to be relieved. When I was left without any financial help, my fraternity dues had been left unpaid. My "parents" recently bought a big, beautiful ranch without telling me.

    When I was left without any financial help, my fraternity dues had been left unpaid. These dues caused Cornell to place a hold on my status as a student. I was told I could not return in the spring--or any future semester--until the fraternity debt was paid. 

I had the $30,000 of debt forgiven by the University only after they realized their mistake, but they still didn't clear the fraternity room and board dues as promised.  These dues caused Cornell to place a hold on my status as a student. 

Thank you for your help.

P.S. I have part-time jobs, but considering living expenses, interest, and the cost to return, it is unlikely I can pay off the debt in a timely fashion

A BREAK DOWN OF HOW I WILL USE THE MONIES: 

I. $7,000 will go towards outstanding debt repayment for immediate return (possibly as soon as Summer 2020 or Fall 2020)
II. Necessities such as food, clothing, and housing will be over $2,000
III. $6,800 will go directly toward at least a 4-credit course at Cornell for this summer, so I am considered a part-time student. They don't give financial aid to full-time students; however, this will allow me to defer my loans and return full time in the Fall. Once I return, I will be financial aid eligible again! 

The GOAL is to raise enough funds for the summer courses, outstanding debt, and car repairs before I reach $20,000. Thank you for your support.