2017 was supposed to be BEST year of my life... little did I know what was in store. Two weeks into the new year I was dealt a major blow in my personal life. My relationship was no more!!! I was heartbroken and severely depressed. I tried to pick myself up and put the pieces of my life back together but of course that was easier said than done.
Six weeks later my granddog of seven years got sick with an intestinal infection and the vet was unable to save her. So here I am trying to get myself together when I had to comfort my daughter on the loss of "her baby." I spent many weeks performing as if I was ok but secretly I was dying inside, Things at work were very stressful & I was messing up left & right. My three kids were needing more than I was able to give, I was hurting mentally and physically and there was no peace to be found. It was at that moment I attempted to take my life with sleeping pills. Of course it didnt work out as I planned and I ended up spending the next nine days in a treatment facility, completly secluded from the outside world to deal with the severe depression and the crushing overwhelming feeling my life had taken. Feeling extremely anxious to face the world again, I left there "therapuetically well.' Minutes after leaving I was told to call my employer and during that conversation I was informed that I was terminated.
All I could think of at that moment was "Lord what have I done & why am I being punished this way." Keep in mind everything up to this point was mental. I had not yet seen the specialist to even address the weird things that was going on with my body. Here I am 43yrs old and Im having joint pains, my hair is falling out, I havent had a cylce in years, I cant concentrate or sleep, my body feeIs inflammed and I feel completely "off." I had previously had numerous labs done and the results were sent to the Rheumatologist/ Immunologist. Two weeks after my mental meltdown, I was told that I have Lupus!! Of course I'm thinking this can't be true because there is no family history on either side. It is now May and nothing in this year is going as planned. I decided to go see my PCP to get a complete physical and share the news I was recently given. More labs were drawn and he told me to follow up with my OBGYN, get my mammogram done and come back in 3 weeks. I did as instructed and was told by the Tech there was a spot seen on my mammogram and not to be suprised if they call me back to get clarity on the spot. This was my first mammogram EVER so of course I didn't know what to think. Well lets just say that's when EVERYTHING changed.
After numerous tests & biopsies I was given the news. On top of everything else I was going thru, I was indeed diagnosed with Breast Cancer. Naturally I'm thinking there must be some mistake, I cant have that. Halfway into the year I have received the worse news that anybody could ever want to hear. From the time of my diagnosis to my surgery date it was six weeks. No time to process anything, I switched to auto pilot and did as I was told. I was on the run, averaging three to four appts a week with all kinds of doctors. I was seeing the therapist, PCP, Breast Specialist, Oncologist, Plastic Surgeon and Immunologist. On June 28th I had a double masectomy and the official diagnosis was Stage II Breast Cancer.
Fast forward to now... I'm currently going thru breast reconstruction and are in active treatment along with getting treatment for the Depression and Lupus or whatever Immune Disease they decide I have symptoms of. For the past 7 months, with the help of family, friends, my church and community resources I have financially maintained things as best I could UNTIL NOW. At the onset of all of this, I was initially scheduled to be released to go back to work on 9/29 but that has since changed. Nothing rarely go as planned and although I am recovering, I still have to have another surgery and get all of my treatments under control so now I'm looking at the first of the year to return to work. I had my implants placed on Nov 20th right before Thanksgiving and thought I was climbing the last hurdle, however there has been some complications with my R implants that needs more attention. Of course that was not in the plan but nothing in 2017 has been.
As I write this I have no income whatsoever and my biggest fear is that I 'm going to loose my home and my health insurance. I've tried going thru the HomeSave program and have even asked Wells Fargo for assistance but because I'm not currently employed and on medical leave they CANNOT help me. On Jan 15th I will be 3 months behind on my mortgage and risking foreclosure so I need to at least get them $1500 as soon as possible. I have been actively interviewing and have secured a good job with a start date of February 5. My main concern is the mortage but the utility bills are also past due, can't afford for the gas and electric to be disconnected during these extremely cold temperatures.
I've done everything that I can to help myself so
I write this laying all pride aside and coming to you as humbly as I can. In life you have to deal with the cards you are dealt and I am revealing my hand to you and praying that the compassion you have inside, will be shown and shared with me and my family during this very trying time. I will admit I don't know yet, why God decided to keep me here, when I was ready to check out on life but I do know with your help I can continue to fight on without worry to fulfill that purpose and the destiny God has for me. I'm expecting miracles for 2018!!!
- Atlanta Cancer Care
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