Khloe Sage Palmer

51810418_1602354221578471_r.jpegKhloe Sage Palmer. Born October 1st 2020. 5:57am. Died October 6th 2020. 9:43pm

‼️for the fundraiser meaning and Explanation for needing extra help/funds skip to last writing (bottom). For those that don’t want to read the whole story or may already know. Somepeople know everything and some know parts but almost everything is here...

i went to the hospital September 23 for “discharge” that I wasn’t sure was serious enough to go. I was 23.3 weeks. It ended up being my mucus plug and baby girl was trying to come early. When I got to the hospital I was 1cm dialated and the “discharge” was my membranes falling out. They rushed me to Albany in a ambulance I case I had her then. And they scheduled surgery on Thursday at 9am but they had to keep postponing It due to other surgery’s. By the time I got in the OR I had dialated to 4cm. They had to do a Cerclage, sewing my cervix shut, to keep her in, my water was funneling, (coming out my cervix) so they had to push a balloon in to push it back in and sew me. I was on strict bed rest untill she came. I was taking meds to stop contractions bc I kept having them. Basically they were doing everything to stop the labor that was steadily trying to come. I was in the hospital from Wednesday till Sunday (27th). I was home for 2 days, then Wednesday I woke up at 3am to use the bathroom and I felt something “hanging out” it was like a sac so we rushed to the hospital in Albany. We got there and it was my water that had pushed through the stitches and was hanging out my vaginal hole... that’s what I felt at the house....  they told me I’d be in the hospital till she came. It could be a day or till December or my due date... it was still Wednesday. I went to sleep and at 3 am I woke up in pain and Called a nurse, by the time they came in I was having full on contractions and basically in labor... I had no idea what had happened or what was happening... dozens of nurses rushed in and were doing things and I stopped and said wait.... am I IN LABOR and they said yes.... they got me prepared to have her natural and then they realize me I had surgery the week before and had to get the stitches out my cervix bc that was the only things stopping her from coming out.... they were trying to cut them out while I was still having contractions. But they wouldn’t come out... they couldn’t get them out.... I started bleeding out..... I was dying... the stitches had grown into my cervix and my skin had grown around them.... and on top of that I had HOLES all in my cervix.... since I was bleeding out they had to rush me to surgery for a c-section and to do surgery on my cervix again... I had her at 5:57am and she was going to be in the nicu for months. I had her at 24.4 weeks... she had a 50/50 chance at life I couldn’t see her until the next day which broke me bc I didn’t know if she’d even make it over night... I stayed in the hospital from the day I went in on the second Wednesday till the day after she died... we went and saw her over 5 times a day and changed her diaper and gave her mouth care, took her temp, wiped her eyes, held her hand, talked to her, I even sang her songs before I left at night. I won’t talk about my feelings on here bc it’s a fundraiser for things(I’ll explain what and why when I’m done). But no one knows our story but us, everyone sees it as we lost a child but it was so much more and we went through SO much more pain then just her lose... I haven’t gotten to her actual death yet but we WATCHED her die..... no one told us she was dead we had to physically watch it happen...anyways about her health when she was alive. When she was first born she had to have blood transfusions because she didn’t have enough blood in her body, her blood pressure was low so she was on meds for that, she developed jandice a day or two after, and her blood sugar level was always high and never got right. But that was the beginning the last few days everything went away and got better except her jandice and sugar. Basically what hurt the most was trying to wrap our heads around the fact that she was FINE when she died... now that, we got a phone call about 9:05pm that she had coded and they gave her epi. Our hearts dropped and my soul left for a moment but we thought it was just a call saying what had happened and she was fine, like just letting us know she coded we thought they were just saying what happened  so when we got down there we did not expect what was happening to be happening... we thought she was fixed. We walked in on the top of her incubator off and nurses and doctors everywhere.... she was still coding.... the whole time she was still dying .... and we walked in on it ... they were only still trying bc they were waiting till we got there to make a decision.... basically they didn’t want us to walk in on her actually dead..... I broke down.... I begged them to keep going and fighting and not to give up on here but they did bc they had been saving her for 30 mins before we got there..... I asked what happened and why bc she was FINE and they said her heart just gave up her heart rate just started dropping out of no where I held her feet and begged her to keep fighting and hiw I needed her, how strong she was and how she could do this..... and not to let go.... then they stopped bc there was nothing they could do.... they let me hold her and it was my first time holding her .... we never got to touch her touch her only hold her hand and change her diaper and some other small stuff...bc with her being so young We could stimulate her bc it hurt her and stressed her out so we could even rub her. Just place out hand on her hand or foot and keep it still.... she had “hands on” every 6 hours for a diaper change and that was the ONLY time we could touch her Due to the stimulation thing...  so it hurt being the first time I held her, kissed her head and rubbed her was when she wasn’t alive.... I never even got to see her actual fave bc of all the tubes untill she was gone she was so beautiful, I saw that she had my nose and lips and broad shoulders I was so insecure about but on her they were perfect❤️  I could let go that night bc I knew I’d never see or hold or touch her again.... I held her lifeless body for 7 hours bc I had never held her before and I finally had my baby girl in my arms. She was safe.  It’s hard bc EVERYTHING happened SO fast I never got time to grieve over not being pregnant anymore and everything I missed with her being early and how she was a micro premie and would be in the hospital till January. And then having to go home without her everyday. And just everything I never got time to feel and now her death it’s just a lot and I missed a lot of things but I’m going to stop here bc I could go on forever. Now why we are making a fundraiser.~~~~

‼️‼️Read Please**

•God blessed us and sent and angel, someone anonymously paid for Khloe’s cremation cost and we are BEYOND thankful❤️ We still have to get her brass plate (headstone) and a necklace for me and Courtney to hold her ashes. And help maybe help with the memorial service.  But along with that it’s been harder then it was before Financially. I quit working a couple weeks before this during pregnancy due to the demand of my job and even if I didn’t I would have had to with bed rest after what happened. And Courtney has been out of work for 2 weeks due to being with me in the hospital and things are getting hard. We will take care of Khloe needs first. As in her head stone and the Service and whatnot THEN and only then, after everything with her is taken care of, what’s left we will used for us to catch back up and get by


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Courtney Palmer 
Camilla, GA
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