Help for Donna after two surgeries
Donation protected
The gist to quickly answer Go Fund Me questions:
What happened?
Twenty-four years ago, my mother broke her back. It was made worse when a chiropractor did not realize it was broken and tried twisting it back in place. The surgeon assigned to her removed a portion of her spine and replaced it with rods, plates and screws. He told her to never let anyone do surgery on her back again or, she would die on the table or, wish she did. Because, she would be paralyzed, from the waist, down. Over the years the pain medication stopped working and destroyed her body, which lead to a deep depression. My Mom has Degenerate Disc Disease. Most of her discs are badly disintegrated. She has nerve damage. Her nerve roots are badly damaged. She's been to many spine surgeons. No one will operate on her spine. She has too many complications and, they won't take the risk. Now, she has been referred to a pain management center, where they can kill the nerves. Meantime, she is going to have to have both of her shoulders replaced in a couple of months. She's been on many anti-inflammatory medications for years and, must stop them at least three months before surgery. Each shoulder will take 6-8 months to heal. Mom also has had a heart attack. She has severe Diverticulitis and other severe intestinal and bowel problems. The next time she has an attack with bowel obstruction, she will need surgery. The last time, she almost died.
Describe the recommended treatment:
Treatment of her spine and reverse total shoulder replacement surgery for both shoulders.
Explain how soon you need the funds
A date for surgery will be schedule in the next month or so. Due to the virus I must quarantine for two weeks before her surgery.
Tell how these funds will help you or your loved one and Explain if there are other ways you need help.
These funds will cover the cost of the bills I normally pay for mother and myself while I am there to care for her. I will also need to build a ramp in the front and back of the house to make easier for her to get in and out of the house. This is a one-bedroom cottage she lives in, so I am not sure what other modifications I will have to make until we are given more details for recovery.
Tell potential donors how urgent your situation is
She has waited and suffered for years to hear someone say, “I am willing to help.” I will have to be there two weeks prior the scheduled date for quarantine giving up my source of income to care for her. Finally finding a doctor willing to help my mom makes this very urgent.
Now an insight into why I have started this fundraiser for my mother.
Now to why the fundraiser. Twenty-four years ago, my mother broke her back. She had a part of her spine removed and rods and screws to replace what was taken. Six years ago, they told her the only thing they could was paralyze her from the waist down. For that, they might as well as give her a death sentence. A victim of child and domestic abuse much of her life, not having any independence would destroy my mom. Moving along. She was told by many doctors/surgeons they would not work on her back because it was too risky. Well the pain she is in daily cannot be dulled by any medication; this was confirmed in July 2020. They have tried everything. We also found out that above and below where they placed the rods and screws has decade to bone on bone and causing the danger of a breakage and instability with increased pain. After many years of searching for a surgeon that would help her, she found one that likes to take on challenging cases. Since losing her partner to frontal lobe dementia in August caused by lack of oxygen during surgery, she has no one to care for her during her long recovery. I am the only person that can help her through her recovery. So, I must leave my job (I am hoping I can return to it once recovery is complete in six to twelve months), to become her full time caregiver. Thus, the fundraiser. I will not have the money to pay my mother's bills while caring for her nor will I have the funds to pay my monthly personal bills. I know this is a difficult time for many people in general. I made a promise to my mom before Brenda died that I would take care of her. She still suffers daily from the lasting effects of the abuse she has endured, just yesterday she fell out of bed from a nightmare and landed on her tailbone causing fear of breakage and increased pain. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place and need help.
I am currently paying majority of my mother's bills since her life partner of 34 years passed away last August (2019). I also have not finished paying off the funeral. Paying her bills was working out because I currently live with my daughter outside of Fort Hood, Texas. I moved with my daughter in Nov 2016 because I was having medical issues and could not make it on my own at that time. Thank God for coming here, in May of 2017 I was told my cancer was back, so in July 2017 I had another surgery and was home for two and a half months for recovery. Anyway, I have a job here as a domestic violence advocate which allows me to care for my mom and help with food and such with my daughter.
A little about my mom, she is a caring woman that has sacrificed herself for others even when she was not in good health. She pushed aside her health needs to take care of Brenda for five years after Brenda was without oxygen for four minutes. No one told my mother or Brenda what damage it caused. It was not until five years after the mistake were, they told what happened, (after the time frame for malpractice suit). Mother placed herself in physical danger everyday caring for Brenda by trying to lift her when Brenda would fall or need help in and out the shower, etc.
My mother has suffered by the hands of others, has never hurt anyone (unless defending her family), and has a difficult time finding joy. She has told me I am her life, sunshine, and her world. She has put me on a pedestal, so she has something to live for (my belief through her actions and words). I cannot fail her when she needs me most. She has lost so much throughout her life to include a day without extreme pain. Since August 2019 she lost her partner of 34 years, a dear friend of 25+ years, and an aunt. My mother has so much guilt over me sacrificing my life and any opportunities to move forward to help her, that the stress of me leaving my job to be her caregiver is overwhelming to say the least. Any help you can provide with this fundraiser would be greatly appreciated.
What happened?
Twenty-four years ago, my mother broke her back. It was made worse when a chiropractor did not realize it was broken and tried twisting it back in place. The surgeon assigned to her removed a portion of her spine and replaced it with rods, plates and screws. He told her to never let anyone do surgery on her back again or, she would die on the table or, wish she did. Because, she would be paralyzed, from the waist, down. Over the years the pain medication stopped working and destroyed her body, which lead to a deep depression. My Mom has Degenerate Disc Disease. Most of her discs are badly disintegrated. She has nerve damage. Her nerve roots are badly damaged. She's been to many spine surgeons. No one will operate on her spine. She has too many complications and, they won't take the risk. Now, she has been referred to a pain management center, where they can kill the nerves. Meantime, she is going to have to have both of her shoulders replaced in a couple of months. She's been on many anti-inflammatory medications for years and, must stop them at least three months before surgery. Each shoulder will take 6-8 months to heal. Mom also has had a heart attack. She has severe Diverticulitis and other severe intestinal and bowel problems. The next time she has an attack with bowel obstruction, she will need surgery. The last time, she almost died.
Describe the recommended treatment:
Treatment of her spine and reverse total shoulder replacement surgery for both shoulders.
Explain how soon you need the funds
A date for surgery will be schedule in the next month or so. Due to the virus I must quarantine for two weeks before her surgery.
Tell how these funds will help you or your loved one and Explain if there are other ways you need help.
These funds will cover the cost of the bills I normally pay for mother and myself while I am there to care for her. I will also need to build a ramp in the front and back of the house to make easier for her to get in and out of the house. This is a one-bedroom cottage she lives in, so I am not sure what other modifications I will have to make until we are given more details for recovery.
Tell potential donors how urgent your situation is
She has waited and suffered for years to hear someone say, “I am willing to help.” I will have to be there two weeks prior the scheduled date for quarantine giving up my source of income to care for her. Finally finding a doctor willing to help my mom makes this very urgent.
Now an insight into why I have started this fundraiser for my mother.
Now to why the fundraiser. Twenty-four years ago, my mother broke her back. She had a part of her spine removed and rods and screws to replace what was taken. Six years ago, they told her the only thing they could was paralyze her from the waist down. For that, they might as well as give her a death sentence. A victim of child and domestic abuse much of her life, not having any independence would destroy my mom. Moving along. She was told by many doctors/surgeons they would not work on her back because it was too risky. Well the pain she is in daily cannot be dulled by any medication; this was confirmed in July 2020. They have tried everything. We also found out that above and below where they placed the rods and screws has decade to bone on bone and causing the danger of a breakage and instability with increased pain. After many years of searching for a surgeon that would help her, she found one that likes to take on challenging cases. Since losing her partner to frontal lobe dementia in August caused by lack of oxygen during surgery, she has no one to care for her during her long recovery. I am the only person that can help her through her recovery. So, I must leave my job (I am hoping I can return to it once recovery is complete in six to twelve months), to become her full time caregiver. Thus, the fundraiser. I will not have the money to pay my mother's bills while caring for her nor will I have the funds to pay my monthly personal bills. I know this is a difficult time for many people in general. I made a promise to my mom before Brenda died that I would take care of her. She still suffers daily from the lasting effects of the abuse she has endured, just yesterday she fell out of bed from a nightmare and landed on her tailbone causing fear of breakage and increased pain. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place and need help.
I am currently paying majority of my mother's bills since her life partner of 34 years passed away last August (2019). I also have not finished paying off the funeral. Paying her bills was working out because I currently live with my daughter outside of Fort Hood, Texas. I moved with my daughter in Nov 2016 because I was having medical issues and could not make it on my own at that time. Thank God for coming here, in May of 2017 I was told my cancer was back, so in July 2017 I had another surgery and was home for two and a half months for recovery. Anyway, I have a job here as a domestic violence advocate which allows me to care for my mom and help with food and such with my daughter.
A little about my mom, she is a caring woman that has sacrificed herself for others even when she was not in good health. She pushed aside her health needs to take care of Brenda for five years after Brenda was without oxygen for four minutes. No one told my mother or Brenda what damage it caused. It was not until five years after the mistake were, they told what happened, (after the time frame for malpractice suit). Mother placed herself in physical danger everyday caring for Brenda by trying to lift her when Brenda would fall or need help in and out the shower, etc.
My mother has suffered by the hands of others, has never hurt anyone (unless defending her family), and has a difficult time finding joy. She has told me I am her life, sunshine, and her world. She has put me on a pedestal, so she has something to live for (my belief through her actions and words). I cannot fail her when she needs me most. She has lost so much throughout her life to include a day without extreme pain. Since August 2019 she lost her partner of 34 years, a dear friend of 25+ years, and an aunt. My mother has so much guilt over me sacrificing my life and any opportunities to move forward to help her, that the stress of me leaving my job to be her caregiver is overwhelming to say the least. Any help you can provide with this fundraiser would be greatly appreciated.
Organizer
Sonia Fantauzzi
Organizer
Lynn, MA
