Help to stay home with my kids!

Hello, I am a tech in the ER in, Mich,with lung disease. With the recent COVID-19 pandemic I’m extremely scared to go to work. I have two children at home and I’m the primary care giver. I have worked in the ER 15 years.  I LOVE my job . Always have; until now. I see people die daily, that is not new. However now, it’s a new kind of feeling that I can’t explain.  Your anxiety hits a level you can’t imagine going into work and the hours leading into clocking in. You don’t know who has it, and who doesn’t. Your seeing people die daily in a whole other manner. Within hours. Normal, healthy... not just elderly people dying. Quickly.  You cry leaving work. Could you have been exposed? What if you expose your kids.. what will happen if you die? So many thoughts go through your head. Like never before. I’m scared. For the first time in my 15 year career, I’m scared. Maybe it’s selfish to want to take a leave of absence or work a little less.  I don’t want to be, and I cry thinking about it. However my life has been helping others for many years and I’m begging for help now for myself. I don’t want to leave the ER but I need help. I need to be home more with my kids and little bit who cry wondering if moms going to die.  I need to take a leave of absence for my family. For my mental health. I’m at the end of my rope , not sleeping eating sick. I can’t. I usually work two jobs. To make ends meet and one of mine closed, serving as a waitress . So I’m down to one income and I can’t put myself at risk even more by picking up more shifts. I can’t, I am begging you, PLEASE HELP. Anything! I don’t qualify for any assistance or even LOA because of my kids because they made it so healthcare workers can’t. Also, we don’t have the PPE or enough masks! We are down to using a surgical mask, intended for one time use for THREE day’s! Who’s to say that won’t get even longer. I don’t feel safe. I’m scared, and if we speak about it. They’ll let us go. I need help more now than ever and I’ve NEVER begged or asked for help! Please!!!!
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