Help us farewell our beloved Jane
We've never had it easy growing up... in all honesty, it's been very far from that - and for my cousin's, this is particularly the case. To those who know my family, they would know that they we aren't the kind to ask for help... But now we need it more than ever, and are begging for your help.
About 15 years ago, my Uncle Jason passed away unexpectedly, leaving behind my beloved Aunty Jane with four young children to raise on her own. Being a single parent is challenge for anyone, but on top of being grief struck & having to explain to her two youngest children (who were still in nappies) why their father isn't coming home and helping the elder two (who were still in primary school) process the same grief, on top of finding a way to bare the costs of living while being a stay-at-home mother, unable to go to work due to the circumstances (needing to raise the children) made it all the more difficult. Showing both determination and immeasurable strength, my Aunty rose to the challenge and raised her kids, providing the best possible life she could.
15 years on, her children are all grown up, Tiahna (26), Jordan (23), Luke (18) and Maya (17). 18 months ago, my dear Aunty Jane was diagnosed with terminal cancer. After tests and scans, the doctors found three large tumours in her lungs, and gave us an estimated three months with her at most. This was devastating news for all of us, and with COVID-19 just breaking out we weren't able to spend a majority of the time with her at all last year. In between the risk of transmitting the virus to her, which would result in death as we know it does for those who are most vulnerable, and the restrictions in Victoria being so strict (funerals being limited to a max of 10 people), we were terrified of both losing her & not being able to farewell her and mourn together as a family.
Jane had just found out she was due to become a grandmother, with Jordan and his partner Maramena expecting a beautiful baby boy later in the year. While hearing of a diagnoses of cancer is never happy news, this was particularly hard hitting for my Aunty, wanting nothing more than to be there for the birth of her grand baby. My aunty was always so maternal, and loved kids so much. My mother has recollections of her pining over my older brother before the birth of her own kids, constantly offering to take him off her hands for the night to give her some rest as she wanted to spend as much time as possible with her baby nephew. I have fond recollections, myself, of all of the things she would do to keep us happy as children - from making the craziest looking cakes out of the well known Woman's Day cake book of the early 2000's to painting our faces and building cubby houses out of pillows and blankets in her lounge room and watching movies together. My aunty Jane was also a fighter, pushing through all of the challenges life had thrown at her. The idea of being there to welcome her grandson to the world motivated her to fight as hard as she could, determined to prove the doctors wrong, and took on rounds of chemotherapy as fast as she could. A year and a half on, she was still putting up a good fight. We made it out of lockdown & to a COVID normal, made it to meet baby Kirihini & we even got to spend another Christmas together.
But on Thursday the 8th of July in the early hours of the morning, my beautiful Aunty finally lost her battle, leaving behind her four children - Tiahna, Jordan, Luke, Maya & her beloved baby grandson Kihirini. Now, we are left to bare the costs of her funeral, which as we all know, is not a cheap exercise. As Maori's we usually embalm the body, and bring it home for a few days to gather and mourn. Jane had bought a double plot in Queensland, where we all used to live, when my uncle had passed - where she had hoped to be buried along with the love of her life. Due to the COVID restrictions that are still at hand when it comes to flying and quarantining, as well as sheer expense at hand of flying the body interstate, purchasing a coffin, and then purchasing flights for the whole lot of us to get to Queensland the financial situation we are all in as a family, (especially post COVID lockdown) this is just not possible. Jane knew this as she was coming closer to the end of her days, and expressed that she was okay to be cremated to get around this. While the cost that comes with cremation is less expensive, it unfortunately is still not cheap. Because of this, we are now reaching out to the community for help to do so. We are looking at the cost of about $2000 to have her cremated and placed in an urn for my cousins to keep until they are able to get to Queensland and have her ashes placed with their father, where she has always wanted to be laid to rest.
We would be so appreciative of any help that the community can. Please help my whanau in our time of need. Any donations, at all, even if it is just a small amount, is one step closer to helping us pay for our beautiful Jane's farewell.
We thank anyone who contributes in advance for your act of kindness.
