Help Me Build the Life I Never Thought I Deserved

After receiving so many messages asking me to start one... I’ve finally swallowed my pride and decided to create this GoFundMe.

This is hard to write. Not because I don’t have anything to say, but because asking for help is always so stigmatized and frowned upon. Not to mention that I am guilty of doing it a lot.

I grew up with nothing and never had a family that truly supported me. So when people online started showing me care, encouragement, and kindness it was completely foreign. It felt like warmth I didn’t know I was allowed to have. That kind of love and support was so new to me, I didn’t always know how to hold it. Sometimes, people mistook my grasping for connection as entitlement. But the truth is, I was just hungry for the kind of care I never got growing up. I see that now. For 44 years I've never truly understood my actions, reactions, mood swings, etc. Getting a proper diagnosis has opened doors I thought were cemented shut. I see everything so clearly now.

I’m still learning how to receive love without fear or guilt. And this? Asking for help in such a big way? Feels like a huge step in that direction. I’ve been shown so much grace in my life that sometimes it feels downright selfish to ask for more. But this is different. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity! The kind of dream I never truly believed could happen. Owning my own ranch.

A place to finally start the sanctuary I’ve always imagined.

A place where I can live and work freely.

A place where healing, creation, and purpose can finally coexist.

It's sad that my life has been shaped by trauma, illness, and loss. A complicated childhood, years of unknowingly struggling with CPTSD, serious illnesses, mental health hurdles that came to a breaking point in recent years. I’ve spent my entire life just trying to stay alive. And somewhere along the way, I started to believe I didn’t deserve anything more than just survival.

But I’m trying to change that story now.

And to do that, I need help.

Every single penny gets me closer to this dream. I don’t fully understand why so many people want to help me. But I feel it, and I’m deeply, genuinely grateful. You are all mending a broken inner child in ways I never knew I needed.

I also have a Patreon: patreon.com/coyotemintstudios where I’ll be sharing more about this journey; ranch life, stained glass, silversmithing, taxidermy, recipes, mental health musings, animal chaos, hopefully renovations (!) and whatever else comes along the way.

From the bottom of my heart: thank you for reading, for caring, and for helping me believe this might actually be possible. Most importantly, thank you for helping me realize I am worthy and helping me grow in ways I never imagined.

Michelle