Help Kayla Heal & Get Outside in Nature

Nature, it quiets my mind and eases my body, but I've been having difficulty getting out to it these days due to my health issues. As you may have determined already from the campaign title, my name is Kayla and I LOVE being outdoors in nature. I love it so much that I find creative ways to capture it through photography (people have started calling me the "bird lady" as I am a birder as well), and I have recently discovered that my images and nature stories I've posted online not only help me, but has helped others!


In 2018 I started to have worse symptoms that had me concerned; I found I was unable to eat a lot of foods without bad gastro effects; I have had food sensitivities since my teens and bowel issues (gluten, dairy, etc) but even alternative options and fruits and vegetables I couldn't tolerate anymore, and became sick, at some points for days and weeks. In a process of referrals and tests  I was referred to specialist and medical tests were ordered. In May 2019 I was going through a stressful time in my life at work and personally (I had just recovered from a workplace injury/accident in 2018 that left my back injured for a good chunk of the year and had time off work because of it, and ended up making considerably less than I usually do income wise, so I was starting 2019 financially tight),  had scope tests performed that confirmed that I have Crohn's Disease; it felt amazing to finally having a label as to what was happening to me as I've had issues since my childhood on and off; but I also have had Depression and an Anxiety Disorder so it was hard to tell what was going on; was it anxiety making me run to the washroom all those years and have such abdominal pain and fatigue; or was it Crohn's!?  Well, I can now say... it is both!! They are so interconnected with each other and I am just learning the complexities of it even now, 4 months later. 

Because of everything that went on in that first week of May, my anxiety disorder was severely triggered and I was in so much stress I broke down. I was having several panic attacks a day, avoided social interactions and was unable to go to work. I was in Crohn's flare up (still am) and could not tolerate much food for several months, I lived off rice, rice cakes and peanut butter for weeks. The road to introducing more foods as I heal has been trying, frustrating and tiring as I learn what I tolerate in flare up.

I started a medication protocol to help me heal, the first round was about a 6 week process and I had very little progress and often could barely leave the vicinity of a washroom, I am on my second round of a new medication combination, even 4 months later I struggle with this, as it is so unpredictable depending on what I eat, my stress/anxiety level of the day and what it happening in the environment. 

I haven't been able to return to work yet and as of the first week of September have had no income; and we aren't sure if my Long Term Disability through work will be approved. I'm single and own my own house (mortgage) and have a dog (who has a few health issues herself including a vet bill last week I still need to pay) and cat in a rural area. My bank has been unable to help me while NOT on LTD as I am currently considered unemployed (even though I still have an employer & position held for me but no sick days or short term disability so no income). Appointments are often and some require a fair amount of kilometers to get to and gas money. I used up all my sick days and had to go on employment insurance which is much less than my usual income. But that program lasts only 15 weeks and is done now. I've taken a huge financial hit and am struggling to get by; and unfortunately this stress has not helped my mental illness or my Crohn's.

I've been seeing a mental health therapist, and we've discovered my symptoms and mental state are so much better when I spend time with nature and I've been starting to do a bit of Ecotherapy; I am thankful to have a decent yard which I maintain and enjoy gardening. I was able to devote a bit more attention to it this year being off work and it allowed me to get outside for small bits of a time, even on days I really struggle, on very bad days I was able to look at it from inside and enjoy the birds. In a recent storm; one of my trees split and came down and ruined part of my garden underneath and I was heart broken as it was a tree that attracted a lot of birds to my yard, birds that I sat and watched, and even photographed.  Prior to my illnesses getting worse I was a frequent hiker and was often at a lot of provincial and county parks. That has been very limited lately because often washroom facilities are few and far between and I haven't had extra money for gas or park entry fees to go to some of these places to enjoy them to feel better.

This is one of the reasons why I need some help,  I am someone who is very independent that rarely asks for help, but I feel like now is the time I do, especially if I can't return to work for another few months- the journey has been long but I know I'm doing the right thing for my body and mind to heal properly, I've felt like I've been drowning in financial stress the past few months and my mood has become very negative, I've stressed so much I clenched and ground my teeth so hard I also needed dental work. I get benefits through my workplace (90%) coverage on most medication but they still cost me over $100 a month to pay for the benefit program; and if I don't pay it then I'm not covered and my meds will be at full price and two are very expensive!

I've had many wins the last few months on my journey to wellness, but the financial aspect is starting to impact several areas of my life.  I can't afford to see family and friends as often and I've been very socially isolated. It's been so bad mental health wise that I have barely even picked my camera up to photograph anything; which is not like me at all!  I really want to get back outside and enjoying my yard and local trails. I am so grateful to live in a beautiful rural area that gives access to view so many amazing things in nature; and I want to be able to share that; not only for myself, but for others. I have had some recent amazing messages from people across the world that say my images and accounts of my little adventures give them smiles and make their day better. I know seeing it, capturing it, and sharing it, certainly makes mine better.  Please help me continue this.  I will be adding some photos I've taken to some updates that show parts of my life and photography hobby.

Thank you for hearing my story!

Donations (0)

  • Lindsay Hodges 
    • $25 
    • 11 d
  • Anonymous 
    • $200 
    • 28 d
  • Anonymous 
    • $700 
    • 1 mo
  • Shannon Bileski 
    • $20 
    • 2 mos
  • Grams Bendle 
    • $200 
    • 2 mos
See all

Organizer

Kayla Bendle 
Organizer
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