Help a transgender man keep the possibility of fatherhood

Hello, my name is Robin and I am a 19 year old transgender man. Last year, I started Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT), and, as a precautionary measure, I made the decision to freeze my eggs. The long term effects of HRT on fertility are still widely unknown. Unfortunately, there hasn’t been much research done on this topic; due to both a lack of public awareness, as well as it being such a small demographic within the LGBTQ+ community. Nevertheless, we are still here.

The weeks leading up to the egg retrieval procedure involved self-injecting fertility medication 2-3 times per day. Thoughts and emotions about the procedure - as well as 2 hour drives into LA for appointments - took up a lot of my time. Thanks to California's Senate Bill 600, the procedure and the cost of the first year of storage were covered. That was one less thing on my mind, and for that, I am incredibly grateful.

Last year, my father passed away unexpectedly. The absence of such a prominent figure in my life has taken its toll on me, and I have been having financial difficulties. In just a few short months after my father’s death, I lost both my job and my home. I have been supported thus far by what my family can afford to give me, as well as financial aid from my college. Due to my mental health, I haven't been able to work since last October. I currently have $1.36 in my bank account, and my insurance does not cover the cost of egg storage. With this fundraiser, I am hoping to raise $750–which is the cost of one year of storage. By next year, I am hopeful that I will be able to get back on my feet, and persevere, as I have done time and time again.

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I recognize my privilege in having the option to have children in the future. Even 10 years ago, these options weren’t available for trans men. Taking testosterone came with the condition of signing away your fertility. Bills like SB600 didn't exist anywhere. Of course at the time, to many trans men, the pros of testosterone outweighed the risk of infertility. I feel incredibly grateful to have both the option of taking testosterone and having children.

I think I’ve always known I wanted kids, and I enjoy being around them so much that I hope to work with them someday too. I am currently considering a career either as an elementary school teacher or a pediatrics nurse. A child’s curiosity is unbridled. Things we take for granted every day, they are experiencing for the first time.

“The idea of teaching a child everything, from colors to clouds, to music, its teaching in the sense of opening up the mind…which is what education is all about. All education is just about making people curious, that’s all it’s about. And to get a child to be curious about everything would be an unbearable thrill for me - or a bearable thrill.”

- Stephen Sondheim

There’s nothing more rewarding than seeing someone learn a new skill right before your eyes. It’s like magic. When my little brother, Mateo, was just learning to walk, I taught him how to open doors. His grubby little hands gripped the doorknob of every room. I laughed. My mother was not so amused. But I knew how many doors, both literally and metaphorically, I had just opened for him. Now he’s almost 10 years old and all grown up. I taught him how to tie his shoes just last year. I know Mateo will use both these skills over and over again, every day of his life. But in that moment that I had taught him, for the first time, he had done it successfully. That's an accomplishment—you can only ever do something for the first time once.

I hope by the time I have kids, being a man and carrying a child won't be seen as mutually exclusive things. I hope I won't have to explain myself every time I walk into the OB/GYN. I hope I won't be seen as an anomaly, but instead as someone who’s understood. And I hope that by sharing my story here I am able to bring awareness to this unique experience—one that, perhaps with more time and research, will become more common.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you for your time, and I hope you will consider donating to my cause.

PS: Any money donated after we reach the $750 mark will be put into a savings account—to use for future years of storage.