Please Help Us Stay In our Home or find a new one
Hello, for those who don't know, my name's Caleb, and my fiancee is Ellie. It's been a long road to recovery for us, and we're closer than I feel we've been in years, but ultimately the struggle to survive with mental illness has brought us to this point again, where well... I guess it's begging here, or it's begging on the streets, and there's been this wicked heatwave in the North-East, only way to beat the heat's to stay out of the sun, and you can't do that reliably if you've gotta ask as many people as you can about some spare change. I'd know, I was homeless in Florida for most of two years a while back, and the weather's been pushing the limits of what I'd figured out how to tolerate in even the dryest of summers of my youth.
We're always worried that we'll have finally asked too much. We both, independently learned that as kids, and the whole fiasco of trying to get ourselves established here in Philadelphia with no money and no family was... uh, well, it definitely complicated things for us, as we've been attempting to recover and rehabilitate. I'd claim I've had an easier time of it than Ellie, but in truth that just means I've become very lucid about my dysfunction. It's been a fight to actually get ourselves to treatment, and part of the problem is our current living situation making it difficult for us to do much of any of the living stuff. We moved into a houseshare, the only one that would ignore me not having an ID back in October 2018, and that wanted the money more than anything. Compared to concrete, or a friend's grandma's living room? Having a friend hook us up with a blow up mattress and a single-serve coffee machine, and having the chance to sleep? It felt like heaven at first.
Problem is, in a house share, once you gotta start doing things like, cooking, cleaning, showering? You start running into the whole "shared common area" issue. And we share the kitchen and living room with a family of young adults and teens, all brothers and sisters, with no parents, and a baby, and no clue how to clean literally anything. No clue, no desire, no interest, whether its their mess, their problem... I was actually getting a break on rent for months for picking up after these guys let so much trash build up on our porch that the neighbors were complaining about the stray cats and possums that were constantly picking through it. It's a literal eternal struggle to try and get them to consistently take trash out, and tie up their trash bags, and not chuck them so trash can rip the bag open. To say nothing of the other housemates we've had. The only reason been able to cope as long as we have with the chaos of this place--between thefts, the filth, a fistfight, and having our day begin with another housemate kicking our door in and screaming homophobic remarks at us because of someone else's chicanery during the wee hours?-- because of a specific friend with a big heart and the ability to try and spot us when the chips are down. But we can't ask him to solve stuff this big. Even when I couldn't keep work, if it came to a pinch... he'd help us on the rent if my savings ran out. But I realized that we spent a long time trying to cope with just something unsustainable.
See, with all of this chaos, and the hostility with new housemates over ongoing thefts and the continuing filth, and the landlord being the most apathetic man, Ellie and I haven't been able to recover. I've been trying, but... I can only get so far without Ellie being able to take certain steps, too. And... she can't. She can't get better here, and after the psycho woman down the hall had the audacity to kick in our door and scream at us for what felt like an eternity? She can't rest easy if anyone's stomping around the hall, our door's next to the stairwell, and trust me--- people STOMP down the hall. We've realistically needed to move the entire time we've lived here if our goal was to actually get better.
With all the chaos, I ain't been able to get well enough to find work, and after a while, it starts to look bad. People dont' want to hire you 'cause apparently no one wants to hire you, or you ain't trying. I'm waiting for my final, confirmed offer on a Whole Foods job with Amazon starting in August, but that's not gonna come soon enough. We're three months behind on rent, and we've got an eviction, so throw legal fees on top of it... Without work, I can't really get much in the way of eviction prevention assistance from the city, and they tend to favor families with kids. I can try some local churches, but they tend to only be able to do about $300 for any one household, and uh... that's not gonna cut it.
All these previous times, I've only ever thought about asking for enough for us to solve our problems now. I keep thinking I just need enough time to find a "medium-term solution". But that means I'm literally only thinking about the short-term, and as an addict in recovery, and someone who's been homeless for a long time before... I know, from my own mistakes and those of former friends? That's why nobody gets out. You gotta really think about what the long term planning is to get anywhere, or you have to blessed that someone's willing to help you figure it out. But... well, I've got an internet connection still, and that, combined with reaching out the our friends online to reach out and spread the word... well. It's saved our lives before, and hopefully, if things go well, it can do more than just save us from disaster this time.
So... here's why the goal's higher this time than I've ever dared ask from anyone, and here's why I'm desperate: We've got a court date on July 31st for our eviction. I owe my landlord three month's back rent and legal fees, totalling $2,125.25. It'd be about $500 for us and our cat to stay here another month, and I need to negotiate a number with him to cover the cat having been here for two months now. One way or another, we also need to _leave_. We have a friend who'd be able to go in with us to try and either buy something cheap from the city, or to rent out an apartment for us and them and the cat alone-- in September, and for that we'd need at least $1500. Then... finally, well. This is the part that's a pipe dream, if we somehow, blessedly actually exceed those goals? For $3000, I could pay up front for a year of classes with the Chikara Wrestle Factory, and finally start pursuing my lifelong dream of being a professional wrestler, in one of the cities that is most deeply steeped in the sport's history and tradition.
With a place to ourselves in due time, and the ability to work as I go? We can do this. We just can't afford to be back on the streets while trying to make progress. And we can't afford to stay here in the boarding house. We just... well, sadly we need help to get his done, and maybe I've already waited too long to ask for it. Hopefully not, but... come whatever may, thank you, for your time, and for your help. If you can't donate anything, please, spread the word. Everything helps. Everything! Anything.
We're always worried that we'll have finally asked too much. We both, independently learned that as kids, and the whole fiasco of trying to get ourselves established here in Philadelphia with no money and no family was... uh, well, it definitely complicated things for us, as we've been attempting to recover and rehabilitate. I'd claim I've had an easier time of it than Ellie, but in truth that just means I've become very lucid about my dysfunction. It's been a fight to actually get ourselves to treatment, and part of the problem is our current living situation making it difficult for us to do much of any of the living stuff. We moved into a houseshare, the only one that would ignore me not having an ID back in October 2018, and that wanted the money more than anything. Compared to concrete, or a friend's grandma's living room? Having a friend hook us up with a blow up mattress and a single-serve coffee machine, and having the chance to sleep? It felt like heaven at first.
Problem is, in a house share, once you gotta start doing things like, cooking, cleaning, showering? You start running into the whole "shared common area" issue. And we share the kitchen and living room with a family of young adults and teens, all brothers and sisters, with no parents, and a baby, and no clue how to clean literally anything. No clue, no desire, no interest, whether its their mess, their problem... I was actually getting a break on rent for months for picking up after these guys let so much trash build up on our porch that the neighbors were complaining about the stray cats and possums that were constantly picking through it. It's a literal eternal struggle to try and get them to consistently take trash out, and tie up their trash bags, and not chuck them so trash can rip the bag open. To say nothing of the other housemates we've had. The only reason been able to cope as long as we have with the chaos of this place--between thefts, the filth, a fistfight, and having our day begin with another housemate kicking our door in and screaming homophobic remarks at us because of someone else's chicanery during the wee hours?-- because of a specific friend with a big heart and the ability to try and spot us when the chips are down. But we can't ask him to solve stuff this big. Even when I couldn't keep work, if it came to a pinch... he'd help us on the rent if my savings ran out. But I realized that we spent a long time trying to cope with just something unsustainable.
See, with all of this chaos, and the hostility with new housemates over ongoing thefts and the continuing filth, and the landlord being the most apathetic man, Ellie and I haven't been able to recover. I've been trying, but... I can only get so far without Ellie being able to take certain steps, too. And... she can't. She can't get better here, and after the psycho woman down the hall had the audacity to kick in our door and scream at us for what felt like an eternity? She can't rest easy if anyone's stomping around the hall, our door's next to the stairwell, and trust me--- people STOMP down the hall. We've realistically needed to move the entire time we've lived here if our goal was to actually get better.
With all the chaos, I ain't been able to get well enough to find work, and after a while, it starts to look bad. People dont' want to hire you 'cause apparently no one wants to hire you, or you ain't trying. I'm waiting for my final, confirmed offer on a Whole Foods job with Amazon starting in August, but that's not gonna come soon enough. We're three months behind on rent, and we've got an eviction, so throw legal fees on top of it... Without work, I can't really get much in the way of eviction prevention assistance from the city, and they tend to favor families with kids. I can try some local churches, but they tend to only be able to do about $300 for any one household, and uh... that's not gonna cut it.
All these previous times, I've only ever thought about asking for enough for us to solve our problems now. I keep thinking I just need enough time to find a "medium-term solution". But that means I'm literally only thinking about the short-term, and as an addict in recovery, and someone who's been homeless for a long time before... I know, from my own mistakes and those of former friends? That's why nobody gets out. You gotta really think about what the long term planning is to get anywhere, or you have to blessed that someone's willing to help you figure it out. But... well, I've got an internet connection still, and that, combined with reaching out the our friends online to reach out and spread the word... well. It's saved our lives before, and hopefully, if things go well, it can do more than just save us from disaster this time.
So... here's why the goal's higher this time than I've ever dared ask from anyone, and here's why I'm desperate: We've got a court date on July 31st for our eviction. I owe my landlord three month's back rent and legal fees, totalling $2,125.25. It'd be about $500 for us and our cat to stay here another month, and I need to negotiate a number with him to cover the cat having been here for two months now. One way or another, we also need to _leave_. We have a friend who'd be able to go in with us to try and either buy something cheap from the city, or to rent out an apartment for us and them and the cat alone-- in September, and for that we'd need at least $1500. Then... finally, well. This is the part that's a pipe dream, if we somehow, blessedly actually exceed those goals? For $3000, I could pay up front for a year of classes with the Chikara Wrestle Factory, and finally start pursuing my lifelong dream of being a professional wrestler, in one of the cities that is most deeply steeped in the sport's history and tradition.
With a place to ourselves in due time, and the ability to work as I go? We can do this. We just can't afford to be back on the streets while trying to make progress. And we can't afford to stay here in the boarding house. We just... well, sadly we need help to get his done, and maybe I've already waited too long to ask for it. Hopefully not, but... come whatever may, thank you, for your time, and for your help. If you can't donate anything, please, spread the word. Everything helps. Everything! Anything.
Organizer
Ellie Gray
Organizer
Philadelphia, PA
