<div>So as many of y'all know, back in April, I foolishly decided to kick a Cybertruck, thinking it would be funny. Unfortunately, the owner happened to be nearby and decided to have me arrested for felony vandalism, claiming damages.

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<div>He also decided to put a smug smirking video online gloating about how he got me arrested. This went viral, and now I am randomly recognized by people, which is not as much fun as you might think. So you can probably find that online if you want to see.

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<div>I was lucky to have savings that covered my defense fees and the restitution for the damage the owner claimed I caused, and further lucky to be able to have my charges dropped down to misdemeanor, with 1 year of probation before I can get the charges dismissed.

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<div>However, kicking a supposedly bulletproof Cybertruck on a whim has cost me over $10k in legal fees, restitution, and defense.

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<div>With my husband having been laid off from his job recently and inflation skyrocketing, it's a pretty terrible time not to have savings, and I could use some help.

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<div>That said, here are a whole list of reasons NOT to donate to this GoFundMe!

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<li>I'm generally a pretty well-off dude. I make a decent amount of money and can afford a comfortable lifestyle.

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<li>I'm not always careful with money. I could be better with impulse control and NOT buying that cool shirt or that sashimi combo!

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<li>I did this to myself. I shouldn't have been impulsive and kicked that stupid-ass rolling dumpster, no matter how fun it seemed like it would be (and was)!

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<li>There are many, many people more in need. GoFundMe is filled with people struggling to pay rent, to pay medical bills, to save a sick pet, to relocate from dangerous environments. They deserve and need your money much more than I do!

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<div>If any of those are motivating to you, please take your generous donation and apply it where it will do the most good. It will do me SOME good, but not the MOST good.

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<div>That said, here are two reasons you might want to donate to me:

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<li>I really could use it. In the matter of a couple months, all my financial stability was stripped away. If you wanna help a well-meaning idiot out, he'd be grateful.

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<li>Fuck Cybertrucks. Serious, fuck those things, and fuck Elon Musk.

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<div>Thank you for your time.

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Wesley Porter

Anonymous

Simon Dupéré

Natalie Louis

Jade Strom

Watts Martin

Michael Perriatt

Seth Morabito

David Rust

Scott Wilson

Vincent Suzukawa

Alice Dryden

Peter Newman

He Kicked a Cybertruck! You Will Believe What Happened Next!

Just $775$ to go! Make an impact.

He Kicked a Cybertruck! You Will Believe What Happened Next!

Just $775 to go!
Make an impact.