<div>Hi. I'm a comedian and satirist with a day job, a mortgage, and the deeply questionable hobby of reading congressional legislation for fun. At night. After work. Instead of sleeping like a normal person.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>I am not a millionaire. I am not backed by a PAC. Nobody is lobbying on my behalf. My biggest corporate sponsor is the instant coffee I buy in bulk from Target. I am, in the most literal sense possible, a person who spends their evenings and weekends building a satirical civic education website — which, as hobbies go, ranks somewhere between "competitive birdwatching" and "replying to C-SPAN tweets."
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>But here's the thing: it's actually working.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>The Absurdity Index (absurdityindex.org) tracks real federal legislation and scores it on an absurdity scale. We write satirical bills that somehow make more sense than the real ones. We turn 800-page omnibus spending packages into something a normal human can actually understand — and maybe laugh at, so they don't cry.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>It's civic education for people who are tired of being talked down to. It's comedy for people who are tired of screaming into the void. And it's completely, totally free.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>The problem? I can only do so much between the hours of "after dinner" and "oh god it's 2 AM again." Running this site takes real money and real time — hosting, development tools, domain costs, research. Every hour I spend reading a 400-page appropriations bill is an hour I'm not sleeping, not freelancing, not doing literally anything that pays.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>Congress works 147 days a year and takes home $174,000. I work a full-time job, then come home and work on this for free. The irony is not lost on me.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>Here's what your donation actually funds:
</div>
<ul>
<li>Servers and hosting to keep the site alive
</li>
<li>- Development tools and software licenses
</li>
<li>- Research hours (reading legislation so you don't have to)
</li>
<li>- Expanding coverage and building new features
</li>
<li>- Coffee. So much coffee. An almost medically concerning amount of coffee.
</li>
</ul>
<div>What I really want is to turn this passion project into something bigger — maybe even do it full time someday. Your support gets me closer to that. Even a few dollars means I can invest in better tools, dedicate more time, and keep building something that makes people laugh, think, and actually pay attention to what their government is doing.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>Every dollar helps. $5 buys me a coffee and another hour of reading bills. $25 keeps the servers running for a week. $100 means I can stop duct-taping free trials together like a legislative MacGyver.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>No PACs were formed in the making of this fundraiser. No votes were bought. No lobbyists were consulted. Any resemblance to a functioning side hustle is purely aspirational.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>Thank you for believing that comedy and democracy aren't mutually exclusive. They shouldn't have to be.
</div>
<div><br />
</div>
<div>Visit us: absurdityindex.org
</div>

Fund the Absurdity Index — We're Not Millionaires

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