I never want to hide the beautiful and amazing truth about myself that I am trans, but gender dysphoria causes me to feel so much anxiety and negativity that I often avoid showing my face or playing music in public. After years of research and discussions with medical professionals, I am pursuing one of the few treatments that is proven to have major effectiveness. I'm asking for help raising money for Facial Feminization Surgery so that I can overcome my paralyzing dysphoria.
What is Facial Feminization Surgery?
FFS is a series of reconstructive surgeries done to correct the shape of the skull for transfeminine people after lifelong exposure to the wrong sex hormones. Only a few surgeons in the world are capable of performing these procedures. Although I've already undergone treatments such as hormone replacement therapy, laser hair removal, and electrolysis, these only help for correcting soft-tissue problems. In order to reverse the effects of long term exposure to unwanted testosterone on my facial structure, FFS is necessary.
The cost for these procedures is between $35,000 and $50,000, all out of pocket. The first deposit is due on March of 2020. Almost all medical insurance policies in the United States specifically exclude coverage for FFS. My appeals to my insurance company for coverage of surgeries have all been denied. Over the past few years I have spent tens of thousands of dollars out of pocket on treatments for my transition, but the cost for this one-time event is just not possible for me to handle on my own.
My entire life has revolved around recording albums and touring the world as a musician. I've performed in front of tens of thousands of people, but in recent years, dysphoria has made even the smallest social interactions fraught with discomfort and existential dread. My band, Sonja, is about to release an album and will be playing live shows frequently, so I'm working to be in a position where dysphoria can be more easily managed. Existing in a bold, unapologetically trans-fronted band is important to me. I need to be out there playing and my dysphoria is a major obstacle. This surgery is proven to do be the most effective thing I can do to treat it. But even more than that, treating this will allow me to actually see myself positively, without these incredibly dark emotions.
It's really hard for me to ask for help, but I know that this won't happen if I try to deal with it alone. Postponing is not an option as I can't just sit here suffering anymore. I just want to get on with my life. I'm grateful beyond words for any help you can provide, either by donating to this fundraiser or by helping to spread the word. Thank you so much!