Brain Tumor surgery...In Shock!!

Who knew in that picture when I was supposivley on a care free vacation with my sweet babies thinking I had no worry in the world, that if I knew what I now know I could’ve gotten to the doctor sooner and caught my brain tumor before it was 5cm. by 4cm...After I had my first seizure last week I was rushed to the hospital then after a MRI showing my brain tumor I was admitted to hospital and put on a medicine to hopefully control my seizures and put under the care of a neurosurgeon. So now as i sit at home everyday trying to control my anxiety as i await my insurance to approve my brain tumor removal surgery. Not only do I have anxiety about my upcoming surgery on Friday the 21st of September...but I’m overwhelmed with the fact I can’t drive, I can’t work to provide for my three kids or even work to pay a simple light bill. So within days I went from being super mom who started her day running at 6am to winding down as we ate our last daily meal together at subway after we were at the baseball field all night, after work and school. So my life has durastically changed to adjusting to the side effects of the seizure medicine and making since of all these unexplainable headaches and crazy smell sensations I couldn’t understand but now has all came together. But one thing I tell my kids weekly in our morning prayers on the way to school...tomorrow is not promised. So we have to take advantage of each moment we have with each other. So it’s difficult but it’s out of my hands at this point and all I can tell myself is the lord has not blessed me with these three exceptional kids for it to all be over now. I’m just glad it’s me and not one of them. As a team we have been through some pretty tough things and everything always always worked out. So as I sit here on Tuesday basically trying to check off my highly detailed to do list to prepare for my brain tumor removal surgery on Friday. I was told the tumor is located by a main blood vessel so he’s said whatever pieces of tumor are left will have to be taken care of with radiation and or chemotherapy. In all honesty I’m just ready to go back to work. That’s my mommy therapy that’s not only what makes me feel good about myself but that’s how I provide for us, lights, water, school supplies, clothes food and our house payment to what my kids call home. This is their safe place. So my number one goal aside from getting better is to make everything around them to stay as consistent, normal and comfortable through this “ bump in the road” for them. So we are holding our arms open to any advice, listening ear or any kind of positivness to help us get through this time. 

Thanks for listening,

Amber, Jayden, Caleb & Bella