Help Litz through a Rough Spot

As you might know, for the past 10 months your old pal Litz has been working as a salesman of commercial playground equipment traveling extensively throughout the state of Arkansas. Though direct sales is a bit outside my area of expertise - and a big leap outside my comfort zone - I did make a lot of contacts and managed to make a few modest sales. Sadly, the sum total was not enough to justify my boss keeping me on as a salaried employee, and worse, there is just no friggin' way I can repay debts and support my family on the unpredictable (or in my case, predictably low) nature of sales commissions alone. So my hopeful experiment in a new and different career field is rushing headlong toward its disappointing end. And by the end of this month, there will be no income at all with which to pay bills.  And brother, that sucks. (Not as much as SOME woes obviously, but still.)

I am and have been desperately job hunting for a couple of weeks now, but December is the absolute worst time of the year for the unemployed. It's bad enough that decent (non-"entry level") opportunities for skillful marketing writers/designers are few and far between in this poor, backwards state, but the stress, worry, and frustration of even temporary unemployment is intensified by potential employers' attitudes of "oh, just wait until after the start of the new year!" That advice is worthless, imho.
 

With deep humility, embarrassment, shame, regret, no options, and little hope, I am asking for the financial help of dear but not near friends to keep my personal financial ship afloat (more of a pirogue actually) for about 6 weeks. Getting behind - which has happened a couple of times lately - is very costly (charges and fees, frozen accounts, etc) and terribly stressful (constant collection calls, credit downgrades, inability to fund grocery/household/auto/kids needs, etc.) and nigh impossible to escape from once sunk.
 

If you can help a homeboy out with some scratch (or a job lead), I can only promise the sincerest enduring gratitude - and assurances that your kindness will be paid forward when gainful employment has again been secured. I expect that might take a month, maybe one and a half. If things are still grim and gloomy in mid- or late January, I'll adopt a new plan: a combination of estate sale, plasma selling, aluminum can recycling, panhandling, dishwashing or similar, and maybe turning tricks! (Just kidding about that last part!) Any amount you offer will be greatly appreciated of course, but if it's sizeable, we'll name our next kid (ha ha) after you! Or our next pet.
 

Thanks kindly and God bless us one and all!