On Valentine's Day 2025- I was headed to get flowers in my shit box Ford Escort and driving on i-880 South. Traffic was relatively calm, stop and go. Suddenly a bright light entered my mirror and my car was being smashed from behind relentlessly.

I held my brake because I figured the driver would realize she made a mistake but she didn't let up. She held the accelerator.

I ended up flipping into oncoming traffic and checked to see if my arms worked. Then I moved my legs. I checked to see if I could move my vehicle but that wasn't possible either. The woman who hit me watched as traffic maneuvered around me. I looked for my phone to dial 911 but I couldn't find it. The lights in my car didn't work before the accident and certainly did not work during the accident. I reached over into my backpack where I carry a high powered pen size flashlight that I found once in a parking lot and began flashing it to oncoming traffic and continued to look for my phone. I helplessly looked back at the woman who, thankfully, parked her car on the side of the road but likely (imo) hoped oncoming traffic would finish the job. People passed by and made jokes like: "you can't park there." Some people said things that I shouldn't share on here.

Anyway, the paramedics and police arrived eventually and helped push my car to the side of the road. I gathered a few meaningless and meanful items from my shitbox car and the young EMTs touched certain parts of my body which was full of adrenaline. I was determined to at least show up for Valentine's Day and eventually my Valentine arrived at the crash scene to pick me up. We sat around and I was saying funnier things than I normally do and if you know me, you know I'm off the wall. I was really off the wall that night and don't have much memory of the evening.

I went to sleep that night which was a mistake. I woke up the next morning with what I thought was whiplash and asked to be taken to the emergency room.

The emergency room trauma doctor insisted I was "wasting resources" to build a case for my accident but after multiple cat scans, it was discovered that I had a very serious subdural hematoma. The neurosurgeon quickly changed that doctor's tune and said that had I not come in sooner, I may have died. My brain was bleeding slowly and I was to stay in the hospital.

Eventually, after time spent in the hospital- I was released.

At the moment- I'm in this waiting process and I could use all the financial help I can get until things kick in. It's been two weeks now that I've been out of work. I've filed for EDD and I've made claims with the insurance companies but the process is slow and I am just trying to navigate everything without stressing out before my next appointment with my neurosurgeon.

I wake up screaming from car accident dreams. I feel confused all the time. Listening to voice-mail is a daunting task and I write lists of what I need to accomplish daily:

•Make coffee

•Text my mother and tell her I love her

•Make smoothie

•Brush teeth

•Take shower

•Make my bed

•Think of five things I'm grateful for

•Wait patiently for my insurance company to advocate for me.

Yesterday someone sent me some funds for frozen blueberries and I was grateful for that.

I'm trying to raise $600 until funds begin coming in and I can (financially) get back on my feet again and afford Lyft rides to constant appointments and other miscellaneous things that I can't think of due to the confusion I'm dealing with morning after morning.

Anything helps.

-B