Stella's Transformation Journey =)
Hi family,
If you are reading this, you are either part of my family or close enough to someone related to me that I consider you family, haha.
So most of you know that I am currently battling an eating disorder. It's been about 1 year since I first left Rady Children's hospital in San Diego where I spent 30 days working on restoring my weight. Unfortunately, when I left the hospital, I wasn't mentally ready to get better. I was supposed to be "in recovery" but I just did not have the motivation to actually follow through with it. An eating disorder is a baffling disease. It engulfs you fully and steals your life completely. There are probably pages and pages of information I could share with you all but I don't wanna scare you away! :P
Long story short- here I am now, in a 24 hour residential treatment program so very dedicated to being healthy again. I can't describe what happened when I made the decision to check in here, but I will just say it was like night and day from where I was before. In my heart I am 100% motivated to recover. I am surrendering to the process, no matter what that means. I am doing the hardest work I have ever done in my life! I am learning so much about myself and about others- my eating disorder tried to take my life but now I am getting stronger day by day so that I can steal it back!! This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. So, I have been here since March 31st and I am starting to get ready to "step down" or graduate from the program. That means that I have progressed in my recovery to the point where I am ready for the next (lower) level of care- woohoo!! I'll still be in the same treatment center but it will just be 8 hours/ day instead of 24! I won't get to go home yet, but I will be living in the center's condo here in Carlsbad. The reason for this fund is because I will be unable to work since I will be in program for 40 hours/ week, and it's also just against the rules ;) So, I am extending this out to all of you in the hopes that you would want to help me out- I will need to be buying groceries, gas to get to and from program, and other stuff like shampoo and toothpaste =)
No matter what, even if you do not donate, I have to say I would not have been able to do this without all of you. I know it sounds silly but even if I haven't spoken with you during my time here, you are in my heart and I have lots of love for all of you. I draw from that every time I am feeling scared or weak. So THANK YOU for just even reading this. It takes a lot of courage to be this straight forward but in the end, I am proud of myself for everything I am doing here.
Love you all <3
