End of the week is my surgery, feels like a bad dream I can't wake up fro. I just want to run and hide til after my appointment date. Im scared, nervous, about to be used again like a pin cushion, and in a lot of pain. Hopefully the surgery works, and I'm not in so much pain all the time.im stressing out big time! The closer it gets the more I'm stressing, and freaking out! But I can't let my family see me freaking out, but I'm freaking out on the inside!
UPDATE NOW A WEEK TILL MY OPERATION! I'm stressed out, trying to keep a calm outside, as to not worry my family, freinds and loved ones don't know how much I am freaking out and panicking inside! I haven't slept in over 48+ hours because of the disease and pain this disease is causing me. I can barely eat or drink and keep the food or liquids down. I can barely walk from one room to the next without collapsing or getting dizzy, right side going numb and twitches/jolts of what feels like lightning going through my body and head. It's going to be my first ever surgery and the odds don't seem to be stacked in my favour sadly enough. Every day I wake up in pain, it's worse than the day before. My body doesn't stand a chance of adjusting to the pain because it's never the same as the day before. It's always worse. MOYAMOYA DISEASE IS A LIFE ALTERING DISEASE, IT WILL EFFECT THOSE WUTH THE VERY RARE CONDITION EVERY DAY OF THERE LIVES. THERES NO CURE. THERES NOTHING LITTLE ABOUT THIS DISEASE. ITS A DEADLY, PROGRESSIVE AND EXTREMELY PAINFULL DISEASE TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WITH! SURGERY ONLY HAS A CHANCE OF HELPING. I REALLY DONT LIKE MY ODDS OF SURVIVAL. BUT IF IT HAS A CHANCE OF HELPING SLOW DOWN THIS DISEASE, EVEN SLIGHTLY, I HAVE TO TAKE THAT CHANCE, AND PRETEND TO BE BRAVE THROUGH IT. I HAVE TO PRETEND EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE, BECAUSE OTHERWISE EVERYONE WILL PANIC AND WORRY MORE. SO I HAVE TO BE BRAVE AND SHOW A STRONG FRONT. PLEASE IF YOU CAN PLEASE SHARE AND RETWEET AND DONATE!! UPDATE-hi, it's now just under 5 weeks until my surgery, and I'm in constant pain, not eating due to the pain mm (MoyaMoya Disease) causes, and barely sleeping. I'm feeling really depressed and anxious about the surgery and how it will all go. I no and realise that MoyaMoya Disease is not well known, as I've had to struggle with making doctors, Centrelink, employers and etc even believe that I suffered a stroke 10 years ago. Let alone now getting them to believe that I have been diagnosed with an even rarer brain disease than a 16 year old having a stroke. I've been fighting an uphill battle it seems. After all these years fighting my mind on a daily basis I thought things can't get worse, just make it through the hour at times, because it's like a constant battle inside my head. And they can get ALOT WORSE. Trust me, I'm still battling.i have to say what I want to say inside my mind, make sure it makes sense, then try and say it, and even then it mostly comes out wrong. Then I'm so emberrassed that I sink back and be quiet and just listen, because I'm 26 years old, I should be able to say what I'm trying to say without messing it up. But I can't. And that's only the simplest thing I mess up. I have suffered from major depression since my stroke, and I'm still fighting it, I put a smile on my face every day, smiling like nothing's wrong, but inside I feel like I'm a constant burden on my family and friends. I don't like feeling like this. And I'm feeling worse as every day goes by. Please help me through one of my biggest struggles. Please donate and share. Please help me. Hi, MY NAME IS SHARNA. I AM ASKING FOR HELP, PLEASE. MY STORY STARTED 10 YEARS AGO WHEN I HAD AN ISCHEMIC STROKE(major dibilatating stroke that I'm still recovering from 10+years later) AT THE AGE OF 16. SINCE THEN I HAVE HAD MULTIPLE DIAGNOSIS'S. EVERYTHING RANGING FROM EPILEPSY THROUGH TO TIA'S (mini strokes) TO BAD ALLERGIES (BAD ENOUGH TO NEED MEDICAL HELP). I HAVE SEEN MORE DOCTORS AND SPECIALISTS THEN I EVER WANTED TO AND HAD MORE TESTS THAN ANY PERSON SHOULD HAVE. I HAVE NOW BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH MOYAMOYA DISEASE. ( an extremely rare disease that cause blockages in the arteries and can cause anything ranging from strokes to brain aneurysms and death...it is not curible but surgery has a chance of helping) AND SPECIALISTS SAY EVERYTHING THAT HAS HAPPENED FOR THE LAST 10+ YEARS MAY BE CAUSED FROM THIS HORRIBLE DISEASE. THERE ARE ONLY 2 SURGEONS IN AUSTRALIA THAT DO THE TYPE OF SURGERY THAT I NEED (INTRA/EXTRA CRANIAL BYPASS SURGERY).I NEED HELP FOR THE TIME I HAVE TO SPEND I SYDNEY BEFORE AND AFTER SURGERY (AROUND 3-4 WEEKS).As the government doesn't cover my rehabilitation and accommodation, that's out of my own pocket and my family and I really can't afford that. PLEASE HELP ME AND MY MUM AS THE COST IS AROUND $3000-$4000. I only have around 5weeks til I go for my operation. THANK YOU FOR READING MY STORY. Please share/retweet and if you can possibly spare it please donate !