Help to save my family

I’ve officially hit rock bottom and I am in need of desperate help.  Never in my life did I think that I’d be in this position.  I feel horrible shame in posting this but I’ve exhausted all options. My wife left me the day I got out of the hospital for a heart issue back in July. She took my kids to her parents and have only let me see them 5 times since July 15th.   She’s doing it 100% out of spite.  She bailed on all of our bills and rent.  I also am now going through a divorce and all lawyers are asking for $2000+ retainer fees up front. I don’t have it.  I have proof to show on these bills I need desperate help with. Please, if anyone could please find it in their heart to help me keep my home for my children and help me fight this divorce and keep equal parenting time between my ex and I.