Help Struggling family manage medical condition

As embarrassed and ashamed as I am for putting my life on display, I am quite honestly exhausted and needing to shake the desperation, hopelessness and anxiety that is consuming me. I take pride in being a survivor and not a victim to traumas I have overcome but I've literally never been so low in motivation and strength to continue. I am a firm believer in Karma and the power of positivity so really need assistance, support, and encouragement. I've suffered in silence with all but those closest to me through horrible ordeals. At this point, I can no longer rebuild on my own and have to put my pride aside to seek support for my family. This is not a pity party but a true petition for blessings. Everyone experiences and overcomes tragedies in life and the whole world is currently in a state of despair nor do I feel my current suffering is worse than what others are experiencing but maybe by releasing some of the negativity holding me down I can take some weight off my soul. I've always tried to offer support to others and been burnt over and over in response but I'm hoping that maybe some of the positive karma I've sprinkled onto the world can be returned this time. I survived some horrible situations of abuse and started over from a domestic violence relationship. I have spent the past 8 years experiencing various medical issues and seeking treatment from doctors. Finally, after a long battle I got my validation last year and diagnosis of auto immune conditions. The process of acceptance, anger at how long and hard I worked for a doctor to actually help me, and coping with the unfixable damage that I've already suffered has been extremely hard and draining. In November, my husband had a horrible injury at work and was forced to go onto workers comp disability and fight for treatment for his injury. He is still waiting for the surgery that he will have to get for any kind of decent quality of life to be scheduled and his spine after will never be the same and he will have life long physical limitations. I lost my job in March, had my car repoed in mid April the majority of the "friends" I did have ghosted me, came close to having my marriage destroyed, my house is moving toward foreclosure, and now the only vehicle that we were still struggling to hold onto has died so we have the additional financial burden and stress of how we can even get to doctors appointments and pharmacy. My family is everything to me and the reason I haven't already given up. My husband and I have been working really hard on restoring our relationship and we have 3 beautiful kids together ages 14 on Halloween, 7 and 4. They are everything to me and one has been recently diagnosed and placed on the Autistic Spectrum. Although he is high functioning he can't process emotions and change well. Although I understood when I finally got a diagnosis that the condition is terminal, I wanted time even with the constant pain, none of us really believed that I'd go downhill and have the disease progress so quickly. I battle frequent seizures, loss of sensation, memory loss and confusion, failing vision, kidney stones and currently entered renal distress. I'm honestly terrified and worried about how much time I have left. The financial hardship and burden is overwhelming and I don't want my family to be left with nothing. The current state of this country and the world in general has all but destroyed my faith in humanity. If 2020 isn't the apocalypse for the world, it has been for me personally. I'm grateful and apprective to everyone that takes the time to read this and any support and encouragement offered.

Donations

  • Laura Lindell 
    • $100 
    • 1 mo
  • Nancy Fox 
    • $100 
    • 1 mo
  • Janie Cockman 
    • $50 
    • 1 mo
  • Matthew Rodriguez 
    • $25 
    • 1 mo

Organizer

Amanda Wolfgram-Dominguez 
Organizer
Pittsburg, CA
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