Helping Marcia get on her feet

$1,755 of $1,000 goal

Raised by 43 people in 52 months
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Marcia, a member of fandom for two decades, who helped run popular X-Files fan sites and has also been active in Angel and Supernatural fandom, has had an incredibly hard year, including the death of her partner's oldest child, underemployment, and a lot of financial challenges. Marcia currently doesn't have a working fridge, cooking gas, and is about to lose her phone and internet. She could really use our help getting back on her feet.
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I've been trying to compose this entry for days now, trying to find the right words. But I know that there aren't any words for what I want to say. What there is is an abundance of emotion--gratitude, humbleness, hope, so much love. I wish there was some way for me to let you all see into my heart, let you experience with me everything I've felt for the past two weeks.

I've been shown so much kindness and understanding, support, generosity, gestures of friendship from friends and strangers alike. And I want to thank you, each and every one of you, for every hug and every word and every cent, for the many ways you've found to extend a hand to me and let me know that I'm not alone. I'm overwhelmed, truly. I'm crying as I write this, because I'm full to the brim with this gift you've all given me and I'm much too small to contain it. Please know that you've all made a huge difference in my life.

I've been able to pay all of my late bills. My cooking gas has been turned back on, and I'm looking into getting a new (small) refrigerator. My stress levels have gone down and I've been able to sleep at night. My stomach's been having some trouble with the novelty of eating every day and that's a wonderful thing.

Fandom's kept me going so many times. Days when I was down, hopeless, lonely, missing people who are too far away. I put all of that into my stories, my art, I found it in other people's words and images. I breathed love, in and out, in and out, and I stuck around to be miserable and happy all at once for another day, another week, month, year, decade. But this, now, this is something else. This is something that has no name. But I think I'll call it family.

Thank you--the singular you, the plural you. Thank you so much. These are the only words I have.

Marcia
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This is what Marcia posted last night in her journal about her situation: "As you all probably know, I very rarely talk about my personal life. It's very hard for me to share what's going on with me, not only because I'm an extremely private and introverted person, but also because there's usually nothing good to tell, and I don't want to be one of those people who constantly whines and complains. There are a lot of times when I think about posting RL things, and even compose the entry in my head, but in my head it always stays.

This is not one of those times.


I work as a home health aide for elderly people. The work is difficult in every sense of the word, and the pay is very low. To make matters worse, my work hours have recently been cut, so now I have only a third of the time I used to have, which also means a third of the money. I've looked--been looking--for an alternate job but unemployment is high in the area where I live, so no luck so far. My financial situation has been bad for a long time, and lately things have been so much worse that I'm afraid people won't even believe me. But here it goes.

Everything in my apartment is broken. Everything. The walls haven't been painted in over 20 years. There's only one working tap in the place, the one in the shower. The shower itself doesn't work. The ceiling in the bathroom is peeling. The kitchen and bathroom sinks are backed up, as is the toilet. There was a short-circuit in the bathroom a few years back so I have no lights in there. The kitchen cabinets are ancient and rotted and completely unusable. The blinds are stuck and there's a broken window pane in the living room, where the cold comes right in during winter. The only appliances I have are my computer, a stove, an electric kettle, a small space heater and a floor fan. My refrigerator broke a little over a year ago and I haven't been able to replace it. My cooking gas was shut off months ago. I got locked out of my apartment recently and had to pay money I didn't have for a locksmith to break in and replace the lock, so now my front door is half broken too. I sleep on a single-sized mattress on the floor because I don't have a bed either.

I can't move out of this apartment and into a better one because I was lucky enough to get approved for a rent-controlled place, as I can't afford to pay full rent anywhere else. It's a roof over my head, which counts for a lot, but I can't afford to fix the place up. Since my work hours were reduced I haven't been able to keep up with my bills and at the moment have a $1200 debt, which includes rent and utilities. I haven't even been able to afford food, so I usually only eat once or twice a week. All of my clothes are at least 6 or 7 years old, stained and/or ripped, and I have only one pair of shoes. Needless to say, it's been a while since I bought anything that isn't absolutely necessary to my immediate survival. My computer is my only luxury, since without it I'd have no contact with the world, or with my daughter who lives abroad. She's 25 and I haven't seen her in 11 years. My long-distance SO's teenage daughter passed away in January and we're both still grieving. To say that things are shitty is an understatement of gigantic proportions.

I don't know what else to do. I try so hard but no matter what things only seem to get worse for me. I've been so stressed I haven't been sleeping, so depressed that it's all I can do to get up in the morning. This is really a last resort thing for me, because I don't see another alternative at the moment. I'm asking for help. I'm shaking and sick to my stomach just typing this; I feel ashamed for not being able to take care of myself, but right now I can't do it alone.

So if you can help, please do. I don't know if I'll ever be able to repay you in any way, but I'll always feel more grateful than I can say. http://www.gofundme.com/alsx2w

(And if you can't donate anything because things are hard for you too, a virtual hug would go a long way.)

Tight hugs to you all."
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Thank you from the bottom of our hearts to everyone that has donated to help Marcia. We are so grateful, not just for the financial help, but for everyone showing Marcia how much they care about her and how deserving she is of our support.
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$1,755 of $1,000 goal

Raised by 43 people in 52 months
No Longer Accepting Donations
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Created June 22, 2014
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$100
Anonymous
52 months ago
$25
Anonymous
52 months ago
$100
Anonymous
52 months ago
$10
Anonymous
52 months ago
RM
$20
Ranbir Mudaliar
52 months ago

all the best. keep fighting.

$20
Anonymous
52 months ago
ME
$20
Maria Ermolenko
52 months ago

Hope things will get better soon hon!

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