WE DID IT

Now what if I was to tell you I needed five thousand dollars in a matter of a month's time- a lot of people would say you are crazy. I also was one of those people. Let's rewind some time back, to when times were bad, when days felt like prison, when I was lost in superficial people and things. That's why I would say I was one of those people. When I, Mouhamad Beydoun, look at myself in the mirror everyday I see a beaten, but not defeated person, a kid but in a man's body, a person with dreams and hopes and beliefs within. The second I look away I feel as though I am not worthy of love because I am a monster inside- I break things and shout and scream and curse and hurt people I love when I'm hurt. I'm not making excuses for myself but I'm starting to get tired of feeling the way I have been feeling but not until lately have I been a lot happier. I have met a lot of wonderful people throughout these last two months. I also met a lot of cinical people along the way as well. For those people you know who you are, the ones that would rather post about bullshit or about feeling bad about the things that you want to do but can't, or even the ones that ignored me because they felt that I was begging for money. I'm no one to say what anyone is doing in life is wrong, but the way some people view life is simply ugly. Just remember that you don't yell at a baby when it does something wrong & after living in the hospital for about two years, and not really having a connection to the outside world, then getting hurt by close family, and being misjudged because I was given pain medications as treatment during cancer, I was a new person - like a baby - that was thrown back into this world not scared. Lately, I've been looking at life differently with little setbacks because of minor issues. Going back to needing five thousand dollars for the convention, I raised 4400 dollars in a little over a month because of wonderful souls that God has allowed me to reach. Stop being so self driven with your own thoughts because your own thoughts can sometimes be deadly to not only yourself but the people that love you. I know first hand & I'll save that story for another day. I feel good writing out what is on my mind, makes me feel like I'm okay & I also love feedback!