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IVF for Eva

I wrote this letter in support of an appeal for IVF for my daughter Eva and her partner Matty. they were again refused.

Eva and Matty have been together since 2001. They are engaged and plan to marry in the near future.

They had unsuccessfully been trying for a baby for over 4 years by the end of 2010. Matty was concerned that a lump he had in one of his testicles, believing it to be a cyst may be responsible for their failure to conceive a child. He sought help and advice from his GP.

Unfortunately the believed cyst proved to be lymphoma. Matty had his testicle removed and had to undergo chemotherapy and radiotherapy. This commenced in February 2011 and continued for the most part of the year.

Matty, Eva and both extended families were devastated and supported them emotionally throughout Matty’s treatment. The surgeon who performed Matty’s surgery advised him to deposit sperm into the sperm bank and advised him that Eva and he would be entitled to two cycles of IVF treatment. (Not three as stipulated in the NICE guidelines)

Throughout the period of Matty’s treatment, and I believe what got them through, was the hope that they would fulfil their dream of having a child given that they were to be afforded the opportunity of IVF. Eva had to undergo some testing in support of their application for the IVF. On 04/09/2012 Eva’s test gave her an AMH reading of 8.94, low fertility. IVF with ICSI using the frozen sperm banked on the NHS was the option identified as suitable to their requirements.

On 21/09/2012 Matty received a letter from The Hewitt Fertility Centre advising him that the PCT had refused to fund NHS IVF despite frozen sperm already being held for him. Professor Lewis Jones stated his opinion in the letter that the prior NHS sperm banking due to his medical condition would likely be regarded as an exceptional situation which could be taken into consideration in an appeal to the PCT.

Matty appealed against the PCT decision, supported by his GP. This was a lengthy process and towards the end of the appeal period Matty and Eva was asked for their ages, BMI, height, and weight. They believed, after researching the subject that being asked for these details suggested their appeal would be successful. Their appeal failed.

The reason they were given for the PCT’s refusal to fund IVF was that Matty already has a son. Matty had never hidden the fact that he has a son Leighton who was only months old when he met Eva so why this was raised as a factor in the PCT’s refusal only at the end of the appeaMatty need never have disclosed that he has a son but he is a decent man and loving father who would never deny his son. What about Eva’s right to be a mother or for them to raise their own child and be a family?

In Portsmouth Donna and Dean Marshall successfully had the PCT decision refusing them IVF overturned. They were originally refused because Mr Marshall has a child from a previous relationship. (Daily Telegraph 19/12/2011) Why is their situation any different to Eva and Matty’s? Once a precedent is set isn’t this sound grounds for a successful appeal?

Further research demonstrated how Liverpool is one of the almost 20% of PCT’s that will fund IVF treatment for single women. (Daily Telegraph 24/10/2011) I find it incredulous that single women are considered and offered NHS funded IVF when stable couples such as Eva and Matty are being refused.

I could go on and on about my research into the psychological issues and effects related to infertility but I wish to focus on what my family and I have observed first-hand with Eva and Matty. Eva is a shadow of her former self. She is the fourth of five children and has approximately 42 cousins. Although Eva’s relationship with Matty is longer than the majority of her siblings and cousins with their partners, they have numerous children between them and are continuing to reproduce. Eva suffered in silence for many years whenever she heard of a pregnancy, congratulating the person and crying in private. She is now unable to conceal her distress. Even when her own siblings informed us that they were expecting a child the distress Eva went through far outweighed the happiness she felt for them. She is everyone’s favourite auntie and delights in her nephews and nieces but they only serve to increase the desire she has for her own child.

Matty doesn’t have the large family that Eva has but they have been together for so long that he is equally as loved and valued by everyone in our family. Matty now appears to be finding it hard to discuss the issue and I believe is increasingly unable to cope with Eva’s distress and how her life is consumed with not being able to have a child. Eva does not believe or want Matty to feel responsible for her not being able to have a child so is therefore increasingly unable to express her feelings about the issue with him for fear of making him feel bad. She is eternally grateful that his treatment for lymphoma was a success. They are a solid couple and this issue is potentially causing an unnecessary distance between them. They accept that if they were granted NHS funded IVF there is a chance that it may be unsuccessful and would likely add to the distress they are each suffering now. Nevertheless, as IVF is the only option open to them they would rather take the chance that may lead to a successful outcome rather than spend their lives wondering ‘what if’.

As Eva’s parent I have watched how the desire for a child has affected every part of who she is. Eva has lost her confidence and self-esteem, she was referred for counselling by her GP but was advised by the service that it was not the appropriate service to meet her needs. She is depressed, angry, and always emotionally fragile. Her obsessive thoughts regarding her desire to have child is affecting her functions at work, at home, and in social situations. She experiences guilt and self-blame reasoning that using contraception for so long she possibly missed her chance of becoming pregnant naturally. At times she hates herself for feeling so emotionally weak and helpless to overcome to source of her extreme psychological and emotional distress.

I plead with you to take my letter into consideration when considering Eva’s appeal for IVF.

Organizer

Patricia McConville
Organizer

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